- 4 years ago
I started college three weeks ago and he’s just gone back to work with a lot of overtime after breaking his arm and being off work for a month. I am sure that all this extra time apart is where these dreams are coming from, but I just had another and I always wake up feeling actually hurt. For a week now every time I go to sleep I dream that my fiancé is cheating on my (specifically with his main ex) there was one dream where he left me for her and I didn’t see him again for month, and another where I caught them together in a nearby parking lot when he was supposed to be at the store getting drinks, and I just woke up from on where he was hiding text messages….
I always wake up so sad and hurt from these dreams. But I know they aren’t real. I told him about the first two and he was hurt that I would even have a dream like that at first then after a few more he started to say that maybe I met someone I like at school and felt guilty but that’s not it and after that I stopped telling him about them because I don’t want him to worry about it like that because I know they mean nothing it is just me adjusting to not being unemployed and home all the time and him being at work more…. but because I won’t talk to him about them I just need to vent.
🙁 I’m sitting in the bathroom all down while he’s asleep. I’ve been really emotional lately I don’t know what’s going on. My Dr put me on anti anxiety mess a few months ago because she said being unemployed for the first time seemed to be getting to me, but I still get in these moods. And I’ve been going through this phase where I’m thinking of wanting kids (except I really don’t want kids haha)( and I’m on the shot so I know I’m not pregnant) I don’t know I’m 25 maybe I’m just being hormonal or something in a way I never have before but honestly I feel like I’m losing my mind…. maybe I’m just stressed haha. I doubt anyone is still reading this and that’s okay but if so then I hope you all have a good night and a safe weekend. *vent over*