Post # 1
I just cant get really happy. Dont get me wrong, I cannot wait to marry my fiance and spend the rest of my life with him. This whole wedding process stinks! I cant help but keep thinking my wedding will be a disaster. It will be a small outdoor wedding of about 30 ppl. I cannot get happy about the ceremony because I fear of rain/cold :/. I cannot get happy about my reception because it will probably be bland. Its a small room. Im not even sure if we could accomodate a caterer as we might have to make our own food. We are not having dancing, throwing of the bouquet etc. Just a casual dinner. We dont want something formal, but maybe thats the best way to go?! I am not a very good planner, I screwed up big time with planning my sisters baby shower. My mind is going crazy and I just want the planning to be over!!! I dont even feel like going dress shopping, or picking out decor or anything because I believe nothing will be “good enough”
Post # 3
aww… dont fret! im planning a wedding of thirty or less. i made it a destination wedding on a weekday out of town. i made it exclusive on purpose, but now im freaked out about the plans i made (or didnt) and the things im decided (or havent). i just take a really deep breath and wait for my honey to come home to the u.s. everything else is a bonus. ‘
keep your eyes on the prize… no matter what, you are becoming the mrs to the love of your life… i cant wait (even if ive procrastinated big time)! like i said everything else is icing on the cake…
Post # 4
Aw, I feel this way too sometimes! I can’t WAIT to be married. I just HATE the planning process and I’m terrified things won’t turn out the way I’d like. It’ll all work out in the end!
Post # 5
Thanks ladies 🙂
I really really just want to be married already! I have been engaged for almost a year and have nothing accomplished, except alot of ideas…and then breaking those ideas! :p
Post # 6
My fiance’s best friend got married last spring in front of 23 people in his parent’s living room. Going into it I really didnt expect much at all, but it was a truly awesome day! Since it was so intimate, and the room was full of only the people who really love the couple, it was one of the best weddings I’ve ever been to. They did most of the traditional wedding things – rented tables and linens and chairs and had an arch and first dance and cake cutting. His aunt and grandma made the meal which was a nice (and yummy) touch. Since it was so close and personal, every single person cried during the speeches. It was definitely a wedding to remember!
Don’t let the fact that your wedding is small get you down! From what it sounds like your wedding is going to be all about the love and the personal connections, so who cares if everything is perfect? I’m sure it will end up perfect for you.
Post # 7
I feel the same way, don’t worry. 🙂 We’re having a small wedding (35 guests) and while I don’t feel a lot of pressure about the venue, I did have doubts like you. Is anyone going to dance? Are they going to be bored? Will they think it’s cheap or not really well done? I think certain fears are normal.
I really hate shopping and I have grown to really dislike all wedding related decisions. I know they say you should enjoy the process, but I really don’t! I cannot find the things I’m really looking for, I hated shopping for dresses and I’ve had major dress regret which unfortunately has returned, I just bought shoes I’m not sure are going to work, and have yet to do a lot of the other little details. And that’s without even thinking about lodging for out of town guests and how they’re going to fare.
It’s all very stressful really! I hope the day gets here fast and that everything works out! As long as everyone has a good time and nothing terrible happens, it should be fine. 🙂 Don’t worry about the small things.
Is it possible to have a backup place where you could go in case of inclement weather? Perhaps a restaurant might work.
Post # 8
@BonbonBunny: Oh thank goodness! I am so glad I have a worry twin! Not that its really a good thing tho :/ I hate talking about our wedding, because I dont have any answers 🙁 . Like you, I cannot find myself buying anything wedding related. I dread it and it sucks!!!
Post # 9
@AlmostMrsMcc: Sounds like a great time! If I may ask, did they also hold the reception at the parents house? Did they have a dj ect.
We cannot budget for a dj, so we will be doing an ipod. Im not sure if there will even be enough room for dancing. If I could in fact at least do the first dance (although my fiance really doesnt want too) I think it would be better. I am very worried that everything will look cheap and thrown together because It will so small. Arg!
Post # 10
I feel yah…I second guess every choice I make. I practically have a panick attack everytime someone asks me what my colors are. All you can do is one thing at a time and ask for help.
Post # 11
I had a 3.5 month engagement in part because I wanted to limit the planning-related stress and get on with being married, so I sympathize! The short engagement (while a little stressful in its own right) helped me because I was forced to make decisions quickly and wasn’t unable to agonize over them! My advice would to be to focus on the parts of the day that you care about the most (the actually getting married part, the dress?, the guests?) and try not to worry too much about everything else.
You only get to plan a wedding once (hopefully), so try your best to enjoy it. If nothing else, it is a means to an end (getting married!), but hopefully it will be a super fun day with your loved ones.
Try, try, not to worry about what people will think of your choices or how it will come together or compare to other weddings (the saying, “comparison is the thief of joy,” is true!!). The people who love you won’t care about your color scheme or anything like that… they will only care if you and your Fiance are happy (and maybe whether they get to eat if it’s dinner time ). The people who matter aren’t going to really care whether the food is catered or homemade – they might even prefer homemade. Small intimate gatherings like the one you are describing can be completely wonderful. My rehearsal dinner was sort of like that… ~25 people, small room, etc. We didn’t need dancing to have a good time. At my wedding, we had a dj but ended up having very little dancing because our guests were so enamored with the photobooth! (But you don’t need to have a photobooth for guests to have a good time either…)
Do you have a backup plan in case of rain? I would suggest planning something if you have not done so already, just to ease your mind. Maybe even pricing a small tent if you cannot get a room inside? Or looking into a nearby church? My ceremony/reception venue had another room we could use in the event that rain kept us from having a garden ceremony… my plan was to cover the room in candles if it was gross outside and have a cozy little ceremony inside. It rained for a full week before my wedding and the idea of a cozy little candlelit ceremony brought me a lot of comfort… I was actually a teensy bit sad to let go of that plan when I woke up on my wedding day and it was sunny out!
ETA: If it ends up being cold and rainy, you can still get great photos, like these!
Post # 12
@peachbaby4008: They did it all at his parent’s house. Originally it was supposed to be in the yard, but it was a pretty chilly day so they decided to move it inside. While the couple and their best man and Maid/Matron of Honor were away for photos, we quickly converted the living room area into a reception space. It took 10 minutes tops! They just had an ipod connected through their entertainment unit. You can download wedding setlists with good music that will work for everybody, so nobody really has to be in charge of changing the song except for the first dance.
One thing I thought made a big difference in preventing the ‘cheap’ look is they rented linens and dishes so it was all cohesive. They also got those folding white garden chairs so that it looked put together without having to get chair covers. I think I remember him saying they spent about 500 bucks on rentals – but it made a HUGE difference.
Let me know if you have any more questions!
Post # 13
Hey Peachbaby… sorry you’re feeling down about the wedding plans. Not sure if it’s too late, or something you’d consider…but why not just get married now by a Justice of the Peace and then throw a more casual party a couple weeks down the road. It might take some of the pressure off having to plan a wedding reception? Just a thought.