(Closed) Not asking a friend to be Bridesmaid

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Is there something else you could do to honor her like having her do a reading?  That way she doesn’t have the responsibility but she still gets to feel apart of the wedding.

Post # 4
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

If she is unreliable do you want to trust her with your photography for your wedding?  I guess it all depends on what you expect from your bridesmaids.  My bridesmaids won’t get her til probably 2 days before my wedding so everything will be done by then.  All they would have to do is show up.  Ask her if she is up for it or not

Post # 5
Member
2493 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet, and hope they understand. I went through the same situation with my (supposed) BFF when choosing my bridal party. I wrote about it here if you want to read it.

She may take it badly, but you have to do what you feel is right.. and, hopefully she’ll come around in the end.
Good luck!

Post # 6
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree with a PP, if she isn’t reliable enough to stand up as a bridesmaid, then you sure as heck don’t wanna trust her with the photography!!  The photos are one major thing I see a lot of brides talk/post about and how they wish they had focused more on that or have regret that they didn’t get all the pics they wanted.  

Also, you’ll have a lot to stress about between now and the wedding… pick whatever will cause you the least stress, whether it’s including her or not. It sounds like worrying about her reliability is one more thing that you could do without when you’ll have a lot on your plate as it is, so include her in a role that doesn’t “make or break” your day (just in case she flakes out on you).

Post # 8
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2013

If I had seen someone only twice in a year I wouldn’t consider then bridesmaids material.  I have a great girls I went to HS with, I was in their weddings but we just don’t talk these days, that is just how it goes. Don’t feel bad about it, you made the right choice 🙂

Post # 9
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I haven’t asked a very close friend of mine, even though she has been here constantly for me and has help me search etc. 

She has 8 children between her and her hubby. So i’m sure she understands. If she is a true friend and values your friendship she will understand.

My Maid/Matron of Honor lives 3,500klm away from me and we only communicate through the phone and facebook (when she gets on)

My other two BM’s are my 13 year old daughter and 13 year old soon to be step daughter.

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