Post # 1
I have a hard time talking about this to anyone IRL so I figured I’d post here. I’m not sure if I am alone in this but I have been feeling for the last year or so just…not happy. It’s a huge time for change in my life: I got engaged after dating for 9 years, started going to grad school, and am moving in August to Los Angeles for FI’s grad school to a place I know nothing about (and know no one).
I just really haven’t had the feeling of happiness at all lately. I wouldn’t say I feel depressed, per say. Just numb and blah. And this is a time I feel as if I should be excited about all the upcoming changes that are happenening but I don’t even feel excited about anything anymore.
Just the other day my MOH was asking what I’d like to do for my bachelorette party. After weighing a lot of options, she asked me which one I would have the most fun at. And honestly, I thought of that question to myself for a long time and couldn’t tell which one would even make me happy at all.
I don’t think its the FI I am not happy with. We are awesome together and always have been. I just feel very very burned out in life in general. But I don’t find much joy in things I used to like, such as going out with friends or being spontaneous. I feel like being reclusive instead.
Anyone else ever have these feelings of Blah for this long? I feel like there may be something wrong with me at this point.
Post # 3
@Chapssstick: Depression is a lot more than sadness or crying. For a lot of people it manifests as loss of energy or enjoyment, lethargy, change in appetite, or anger and irritability. If it concerns you enough that you feel you need help, see a therapist or psychiatrist.
I’m a therapist, let me know if you have any other specific questions.
Post # 4
I went through this a few years back. I finally saw a counselor and he told me he thought I was depressed – I was shocked. When I thought about someone who was depressed I pictured someone who cries a lot or has suicidal thoughts. That’s not the case at all though. I realized I’d been living life comatose and made changes and am so much happier. Maybe you should meet with a counselor, most universities have a counseling center that’s free to their students.
Post # 5
Post # 6
Sounds like depression to me. I have struggled with depression since I was in middle school, and it often manifests just like that. 🙁 *hugs* I moved to L.A. two years ago for grad school (just graduated, but still here) – as much as I hated it (moved from the bay area), I have grown to love much of the city. I’m (now officially) a clinical social worker/therapist living in Los Angeles, so PM me if you need anything.
Post # 7
- Wedding: August 2013 - An amazing non-profit retreat
It sounds like depression to me too. It manifests in all sorts of different ways, including feeling physically tired and sore.
Post # 8
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
@Chapssstick: Yes– you’re definitely not alone!!!! I’ve also never spoken to anyone about this in real life but I sometimes go through periods of life where i feel like I’m smiling and putting on a show and looking normal but inside I’m just ‘borderline content’. Not unhappy per se, but just… blah. I work with children and when I’d see their pure happy, joyful faces I’d be so jealous of that feeling.
Luckily a lot of great things have happened recently (in the past year or so- I’m happy with my job, moved in with FI, wgot engaged, taking engagement photos next week) and I just feel like my life is falling together perfectly and luck is on my side, and I am pleased to say that I do feel Happy (with a capital H!) today!
You’re probably worried about the life changes going on. Talk to your FI and get all the reassurance you can from him. I’m sure you’ll enjoy LA, so give it a chance! But don’t feel you have to force yourself to go to a Bachelorette party if you don’t want to though.
Post # 9
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
I agree with other posters. Feeling “blah” and not ever happy = depression. Please think about seeing someone and maybe taking some medication! xox (My FI has depression and anxiety issues.)
@FionnaCake: Fucking LOVE hyperbole and a half. Her most recent post was the single funniest and also most heart-breaking thing I’ve ever read about mental health issues.
Post # 10
Thanks for your support and advice ladies. Good to know I am not alone and not going crazy. I may just try to stick it out until we move because I don’t see much of a point of starting to see a therapist and then moving away a month later.
@loving_life: I think you are me. I am moving from the bay area as well.
@MrsYoshida: I also work with children so I totally get what you mean. I am jealous of their happiness a lot of the time.
@ImaStarr: yeah that’s exactly what I thought as well which is why I haven’t made much of an effort really to change anything. Just thought I was going through a funk that went on and on.
Post # 11
@Chapssstick: Yes, honestly, I agree, no point in starting with a therapist up there now. But I would start looking into one down here. Do you have insurance? And I mean it when I say PM me if you need to talk 🙂
Post # 12
look up dysthymia, and talk to a pro. they can help you sort out what’s what. good luck! you do deserve to be happy you know.