Not enough people on one side of the wedding? (Repost)

posted 2 years ago in Guests
Post # 2
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - Vineyards

I have a slightly similar issue: I’ve got a larger family and list of friends than my fiance and he’s worried about it too. Personally though I don’t see a problem. What are you supposed to do, invited only a handful of people because that’s all he is inviting? That’s silly! If you both had big lists and could only budget for a smaller amount of people, evenly dividing the group would make sense but that’s not the case. 

 

My fiance is also caught up in the “nobody would want to come for me anyway” mind set, so I’ve more or less pushed him to scroll through his facebook friend list and write down anyones name who makes his day better at work or who he has nice memories with or that he would like to see again if he hasnt in a while. Ive managed to squeeze a few more guests out of him by doing it that way!

Post # 3
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

My DH’s family is small and not particularly close. I have a HUGE extended family that are very tight nit. Tit-for-tat my people way outnumbered his at the wedding. But weddings are about bringing families together, not counting heads. My favorite part about our day was seeing my family and friends and his family and friends embrace each other as family and friends. 

There are so many things to stress about when planning a wedding, don’t let this be one of them. wink

Post # 4
Member
58 posts
Worker bee

It’s okay, no one will notice. Just put a sign up at the ceremony saying there are no sides and also mix up tables at the reception

Post # 5
Member
44 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2018

Same situation with me, tbh.

But seriously, if his family and friends are from overseas people should be fine and understand that not everyone can afford to travel for a wedding. It’s pricey enough to attend one close to where you live if you calculate staying somewhere overnight (in cas you don’t want to drive), attire, present, etc.

 

My FH’s family is about 70 people and my guests from Germany are maybe 10-15? We’ll just mix up the tables and go with who speaks each other’s language, maybe age groups or people we think would get along well, because of hobbies etc.

And won’t you all be one family afterwards, anyways?

I’m sure no one will judge.

Post # 6
Member
1586 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

Yes, we had this issue. ~3/4 of our wedding were “my” side, though of course those on my side that knew Darling Husband love him. Didn’t even need to put up a “pick a seat, not a side” sign! Friends happily filled both sides of the ceremony. For dinner, it worked out to separate everyone. Each parent had a 10-11 person round for their VIPs. We then did 4 long tables. His, closest to his parents, was anchored by his groomsmen, followed by his coworkers, and then my co workers (they actually talked and got along – it was great). 

 

I then just anchored the other 3 with my split up bridesmaids. And we did food family style! Got lots of compliments on that because I sat groups of people next to each other who didn’t know each other but who I THOUGHT would really get along. Family style opened up conversation for them and several mentioned this to me. Just a thought, if it helps!

Post # 7
Member
1840 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

We probably had 300 people there for my husband and 30 there for me (I live abroad), but no one cared and I had a great day, as did those who travelled for me!

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