(Closed) Not going to my best friend's wedding

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yeah, I probably would have been a little peeved that you didn’t try to get to NY to catch the flight. But I do understand why you choose not to do that too, I guess.

Post # 18
Member
2624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@LMD:  +1!!! I think they went above and beyond. There’s no way I’d put myself on a train out of state through Snowmageddon.

Post # 19
Member
5153 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

@merpitymerp:  That really sucks 🙁 I know how disappointed you must be! I’m sure she will not hold it against you.

Is there another airport you can drive to that wasn’t affected by the storm? Even if its a good 3-4 hour drive?

Post # 21
Member
2624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@melonseeds:  +1. I would not want any of these PPs as friends if they think I’m being unreasonable for not wanting to drive 5 hrs on an icy road or chance a hurting transit system during Snowmageddon.

Post # 22
Member
7644 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@LMD:  Thanks for that! Yeah no, lol. Then I wouldn’t have done it. If flights, trains, etc are getting cancelled the roads are obviously not safe to be out on. Just because they don’t shut down interstates and highways doesn’t mean its safe (speaking as someone from a very snowy state-ND).

Post # 23
Member
1647 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@merpitymerp:  if she is truly your best friend, your relationship will not change. weather was beyond your control, it’s one of those acts of God type of things. Weddings aren’t summons. Yes, there will be initial disappointment, but hopefully she’ll move past it. 

Post # 24
Member
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@merpitymerp:  Not much you can do about it. Because of the multiple storms, I’m sure there are other guests in your same situation. 

Post # 25
Member
9681 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@merpitymerp:  Let her down? You could have died or been hurt in an accident. It was not worth the risk, wedding or not. If that changes your relationship, then she’s not a very good friend. 

Post # 26
Member
9581 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

@merpitymerp:  I live in NYC- I totally understand how daunting that would be especially by yourself. An expensive Amtrak that might be cancelled- or worse a dangerous bus. Then you get to Penn and hopefully get a 50-70 $$ also dangerous cab to an airport? What if it gets cancelled then and youre stuck in nyc by yourself>>??

ETA: the government advised to only travel in emergencies. This is not an emergency

It is a blizzard. Thats what can happen when you get married in February. You tried- Im so sorry it couldnt work out.

 

Post # 27
Member
3650 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@merpitymerp:  Sweetie, it’s ok. People on this board have a hard time putting The Wedding into perspective.

It is ridiculous to risk travel in these large storms. Your decision is entirely reasonable.

Post # 28
Member
2942 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

There are plenty of airports with in a 2-6 hour drives of where I am if my home airport had to cancle a flight.  I would not have tried to get to any of them in a winter storm.  It really would hurt not to be there for a close friend, but seriously, if the choice is between risking my life and missing a wedding, I’m chosing the later.  Any good friend would understand. 

Post # 30
Member
4697 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Sure she offered to pay for your flight, but I wouldn’t drive 5 hours in a snowstorm to take her up on that offer. You can’t control the weather, if this changes your friendship, then she wasn’t really your friend to begin with.

Can you go down the Sunday after the wedding? I’m thinking if its a vacation type wedding thing, you could at least be there for a portion of the holiday to support your friend.

ETA: Even if the weather was fine, I wouldn’t drive to another state to catch a flight. There are plenty of airports near me (within 5 hours), I would never drive to any of them if I couldn’t fly out of either of the ones in my city.

Post # 31
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@LMD:  This.

@merpitymerp: 

I’m not understanding the “bride would be miffed” comments. I couldn’t even get to work (one hour commute) yesterday b/c of the weather. I wouldn’t expect someone to trek a couple hours for a flight that may or may not happen and ALONE at that.

The bride needs to realize that holding a Destination Wedding during February (a time very prone to blizzards/cancelled flights) carries risks and that all attendees may not make it.

Does it suck? Of course, it does. But it’s life, and you can just make it up to her when she gets back.

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