(Closed) Not invited to my BM's rehearsal dinner. Invite her FI to ours?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
2711 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It’s rude that she didn’t invite you to the rehearsal dinner.  SO’s most definitely need to be included.  While I get that it’s tempting not to invite her Fiance to your rehearsal dinner, I think it would be petty and not a good idea.  Just be the bigger person and invite him.

Post # 5
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Before jumping to conclusions, why doesn’t your Fiance ask if SOs are included?

Post # 7
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

You *should* be invited to the Rehearsal Dinner, but I would let it slide, and invite her Fiance to yours.

Post # 9
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

That’s so weird! I would reconsider her being a Bridesmaid or Best Man in your wedding. So rude and not a friend.

Post # 10
Member
412 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It is probably a money thing for them. I am a Bridesmaid or Best Man in a friend’s wedding and they are not allowing SO’s to come to the rehearsal dinner. While it is irritating I completely understand that it is because they cannot afford to pay for all of those people since they are paying for it themselves. I, however, am including SO’s at my rehearsal dinner even through we are paying for it only because I know how irritated I am with my friend and not being able to bring my Fi (who will actually be my husband by then). lol! It gets so expensive!

Post # 11
Member
914 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Wait, wait… Your Fiance is paying for his own rehearsal dinner meal at this woman’s Rehearsal Dinner, but you are STILL not allowed to go? What??

Post # 12
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@MsVoyageur:  This couple is wrong to not invite you both to the rehearsal dinner.  You should be treated as a “social unit” since you have made the comitment to marry.  But they obviously don’t know about (or perhaps care about, but let’s be gracious and assume it’s ignorance, not malice) this bit of etiquette, which is really just good manners.

You, on the other hand, are kind and gracious.  And you DO know that it’s rude and offensive to invite only one half of a social unit.  So of course you won’t stoop to the level of being petty and leaving your BM’s husband off the guest list for your rehearsal dinner.  That would reflect poorly on you.

You want to be able to be proud of your choices and actions; inviting your BM’s husband (who is also your FI’s dear friend!) is the right thing to do.  Snubbing him could leave a bitter taste in everyone’s mouth.

Edit: (I got confused, even if the female is your FI’s friend, not her husband, I still think you should invite them both)

Post # 16
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@MsVoyageur:  I do know the feeling of needing an outlet!  Weddingbee is pretty good for that.

Good luck with the remainder of your planning.  Here’s hoping that this is the stickiest situation that falls into your lap!

The topic ‘Not invited to my BM's rehearsal dinner. Invite her FI to ours?’ is closed to new replies.

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