(Closed) Not inviting children other than those in the wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@fzesguer:  You will get two different answere here

1) Children in the wedding party are usually excluded from the “no kids rule”

2) You either have to invite all or none.

Personally, I sent ALL children home after the ceremony, including the flower girls. We had alcohol though.

Are the children well-behaved? They do not seem all that young and will keep themselves entertained. Maybe your parents or FI’s parents can chip in to help with the costs?


Post # 4
3783 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I am doing the same as you: only kids in the wedding and kids with special needs. There would be way too many kids otherwise!

Post # 5
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

There could possibly be an age limit or perhaps only children of the immediate family invited and Out of Town guests (this is what we are doing). 

Post # 6
3 posts
  • Wedding: April 2013

I was wondering the same things…we don’t want kids invited either bc our gues list is huge withOUT them even on the list. We had already asked our ringbearer and flower girl before we decided this and i am now wishing we werent even having them but you cant really un-ask can you? 

Post # 8
17 posts
  • Wedding: November 2012

We did not invite any children to our wedding or reception.  Nevertheless, some friends and family asked if they could bring children to the ceremony only.  I read in Crane’s that an invitation is to the day’s festivities, not to just one portion of it.  I decided to be flexible.  Formally, the children were not invited to either portion, the ceremony or the reception.  Out of deference to the freinds and family, all of whom travelled across country, I was happy to show some flexibility.

As for the all or none rule, I don’t believe it exists.  You invite, by name, those who you wish to attend.  If you have any guests who do not understand this subtle but important point, make sure you, or someone you trust, feels them out on how they plan to have the children cared for or watched while they are at the wedding.

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