(Closed) Not inviting children wording?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5183 posts
Bee Keeper

@MarryMeTiffany: I think thats ok, I would have prefered a phone call but it is better than nothing

Post # 4
Member
1493 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

How about just saying “Adult Reception?” I wouldn’t be too wordy with stuff like that.

Post # 5
Member
5654 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

I put

“We look forward to enjoying this Adult Only affair with you”

at the bottom =)

If/When you get people who add their children you can call them and simply tell them

“Hey, I saw you put “munchkin” on the RSVP… Unfortunately we are unable to accomodate the kiddos but really hope you’ll still be able to make it…. yes: Great, I’ll put you down.. no: We understand… you’ll definitely be missed”

And that’s as much explanation you need to give 😉

Post # 6
Member
1137 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

i think this is good no room for confusion, adults only indicates no children what so ever, some guest my think oh so and so brought their child but i couldn’t…. imo you’ve been honest, tackful and most of all informitive …. nice one 🙂

Post # 7
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think the way you worded it was fine… When we sent our Save-The-Date Cards and invites, we only put the parents’ names on it.  With the invite, we included a reception card that said “Adult Guests are welcome to join us for dinner, dancing and cocktails… blah blah blah” AND we also included an info card that had the hotel block info, our website URL and a line about “Let us know if you need suggestions for childcare and we’d be glad to help” or something like that… 

My mom pitched a little bit of a hissy fit, because she thought it was rude, but I wanted it to be crystal clear.  And guess what… We still had a few people ask if they could bring their kids or if kids were welcome!!!!!!!! I think you can never, ever be too clear.  If you try to be too subtle and polite, people will take advantage of the situation. 

Post # 8
Member
3267 posts
Sugar bee

I wouldn’t refer at all on the invitation to who isn’t invited.  Just as you wouldn’t write please don’t include your great uncles on your reply, you shouldn’t write don’t include your kids.

Also your wording sounds as though you don’t think your guests are bright enough to fill out the invitation.

Focus on those that are invited. Don’t assume that they will do the wrong thing.  Even if you think privately that they will.

Post # 9
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I just sent my invites to the people I was inviting.  I was told that’s the way to do it by etiquette.  I had one friend ask me about kids, and I just said no, we weren’t having any there.  She was super nice about it (hey, that’s why she’s my friend!).

Post # 10
Member
1962 posts
Buzzing bee

I think that is fine and clear.  No need to include all that on your invite. 

PS. I hate to be a witch, but please spell check your actual invites.  You have several spelling errors in that paragraph and I want your invites to be perfect.

Post # 11
Member
117 posts
Blushing bee

I think this is fine since it’s at the bottom of an informal email.  I’d use the suggestions above to keep the invitation itself discreet, although putting a number of seats will probably be sufficient. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
3364 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I did a tally of 10 friends

Question: “No Children Please” or “Adult Only Event”

While the tally ended up 2-8; “Adult Only Event” winning.

Though many preferred “Adult Only Event” they did comment that it did come off a bit “risque”…still looking for another option!

OP: I get your trying to communicate what you want people to do, but on your guest list, highlight those people WITH kids, and watch for their specific RSVPs. If something is out of ordinary or dont match up to the “Date Night” request, give them a call or email! I think your reasoning is completely understandable, I have a similar situation, but in all honesty thats no one’s business except you and Fiance.

Best of Luck!  

Post # 13
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t say child free. I think it sounds like they are pests. How about something cute like this:

Leave the kids with a sitter, freshen up, have fun and enjoy a cocktail (or two) on us!!

 

 

Post # 14
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’d keep it simpler.  In particular these phrases stand out:

“Please don’t be offended” – telling someone not to be offended can set their back up.  They will feel what they would feel.  Try “I hope you understand” instead.

“Conisder it a date night” – again folks may not like being told what to do.

My two cents.  Honestly, I’d leave it off entirely.

ETA: ooops, reread and realized you already sent them.  Ah well, what’s done is done.

Post # 15
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I honestly don’t think you need to write anything about no kids at all.  You address the invitation to the people invited.  If the kids are invited their names are on the invitation.  If they aren’t than their names are not.  If people get confused than you can clear it but I feel it is less offensive when they make the mistake versus you pointing it out.  Just MHO.

Post # 16
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I don’t particularly like the wording. IMO it is too long and I kind of felt rubbed the wrong way (PS I’m not inviting children to my wedding). There is also some grammar and punctuation mistakes that need to be changed to help it flow better.

I agree with PP’s a succinct sentence would have sufficed.

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