(Closed) Not inviting family – SOLUTION!

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: I do not want to invite certain family members. Here are my options:
    Invite evil family to ONLY Church ceremony : (4 votes)
    5 %
    Invite evil family to both Church and Reception : (13 votes)
    15 %
    Don't bother inviting evil family because I'll never see them again anyways : (68 votes)
    80 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2718 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    As long as they aren’t close I probably wouldn’t invite them. If it was going to be a big deal to not invite them, I might just do the ceremony only.

    Post # 4
    Member
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    i just wouldnt invite them *Unless* not inviting them causes drama with other people you are inviting.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1426 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    I think it would be a bad idea to invite them to the ceremony only.  There’s a chance that they would try to cause drama by following other guests and showing up at the reception. I would say either you need to treat them like all the other guests and invite them to both, or invite them to neither and decide that you don’t care if you never see them again.  But you can’t really keep them half way in your life…

    Post # 7
    Member
    461 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I put to invite them.  Depends on how many evil people we’re talking about, and more importantly, who will be upset if you don’t invite them and how important the opinion of that person is to you, though.  Inviting people to drive an hour and a half to a ceremony only is rude.  Who knows, maybe they’ll RSVP “no” and it will be fine! 

    Post # 8
    Member
    1638 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I agree with other bees in saying inviting them to ceremony only would be a bad idea. If you are already worried someone will speak up at the wedding I would just avoid inviting them because they are already obviously going to be mad they aren’t invited to the reception.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1465 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I wouldn’t invite them, period. They aren’t supportive of you or your relationship so they don’t deserve the honor of an invitation. The fact that they are your relatives makes no difference if they are unwilling to support you. If someone else doesn’t like it, too bad. It’s not their decision to make.

    Post # 10
    Member
    7417 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Don’t invite them at all.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2201 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    Even for evil people, inviting only to the ceremony is poor etiquette. So, I would say either all or nothing (leaning toward nothing). If they ask why they didn’t get an invite, just say it has come to your attention that they don’t support your upcoming wedding and you didn’t feel it was appropriate to invite them.

    Post # 12
    Member
    7152 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I agree with all or nothing…..invite to both or neither.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2288 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I’m in the “all or nothing” boat. In this case, I wouldn’t invite them. How crass of your father to give that sort of ultimatum. At this point if you’re cool with it, move forward with not sending an invite at all.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1426 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    yikes! Well, if you’re really to the point that you don’t mind if he doesn’t show up, then I say call his bluff.  Only you can judge whether what these people have done to you is bad enough to warrant cutting them out of your life, but if it is, then you need to do what’s best for you and your Fiance.

    Post # 16
    Member
    606 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I’d say don’t invite them – your wedding day should be a joyous occasion, not one filled with drama and worry. Nobody controls their behavior but them, and they choose to act this way so they choose not to come.

    Bella

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