(Closed) Not inviting guests to the reception dinner???

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

This question seems to come up a lot, and the answer always is no. It is not acceptable or okay to invite someone to some part of your wedding when not inviting them to the reception. Why don’t you explain to them that yoiu have such a limited guests list and go out for drinks to celebrate when you get back from your honeymoon.

Post # 4
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I agree with roxy821.  It is never okay to invite them to part of the wedding day activities.  I think it would be best to celebrate like she suggested

Post # 5
Member
1482 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am with roxy on this one.  Unfortunately, it would be in poor taste to invite people to only part of the reception.  What about finding a spot for an after party?  You could always spread the word that you’ll all be meeting up for drinks at XYZ after the wedding and you would love to have them join you.

Post # 6
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I wouldn’t say its tacky but I don’t think its a great idea.  I feel like, if I were invited to the cocktail portion knowing that there was dinner served beforehand, I’d be a bit offended.  Like I didn’t make the cut or something. 

Post # 7
Member
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Ritz-Carlton, Half Moon Bay

celebrate with them some other time at more casual drinks–you still get to celebrate but without any awkwardness or hurt feelings!

Post # 8
Member
375 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Sorry, but I am going to have to agree.  Definitely a “no”.

Post # 9
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think its okay. I actually know someone who did this. However, for her it worked because the dinner and cocktails/dancing were not in the same place/room. She had a daytime wedding and then had a reception that started at 7/730sih and the invitation said cocktails/dancing and also they had the cake there. As for the dinner they only had the wedding party and family members go to that. I definitely think you can make it work if you ask me.

Post # 10
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think as long as you do the dinner part with just wedding party and family it would be okay, I dont see feelings being hurt that way personally.

Post # 11
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

I think the only way it would work would be the way Lola821 explained.

Post # 13
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010
Post # 14
Member
1585 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It is wrong to invite someone to your ceremony and not to the reception.  I agree that you should offer to celebrate with them at a later time if you cannot have them at your reception.

Post # 15
Member
944 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Okay, so the cocktail part will be held at the same place as the ceremony?  And the dinner will be somewhere else?  Am I understanding this right.

If that is the case, and you just do family and wedding party, then I would totally say yes to the small dinner guest list only.  There is nothing wrong with that personally.  Then again you don’t need to announce that the family only will attend the dinner later on while at the cocktail party.  Know what I mean? 

If you were to just invite family and wedding party to the dinner, who many people would that be out of the total guest list? 

If you are wanting to do something like this it will have to be all or nothing.  No extra friends, just wedding party and the family—otherwise it could get dicey.

I would also like to add that not too long ago it was very common to only have punch and cake for the “reception” and dinner was never served.  If you did serve dinner than it was very small and family only thing.

Post # 16
Member
799 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’m going to have to go with no on this one.  How do you expect people to leave when dinner is served?  That would be super awkward for the guests…

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