(Closed) Not inviting someone after you already sent the STD

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
8036 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

You can’t just ignore her at this point. It would be really rude. I say don’t burn bridges unless you have to.

If you want to un-invite her, put on your big girl panties and phone her, explain the situation (or make something up). You can’t have it both ways.

 

Post # 19
Hostess
7547 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

If you’re no longer working with her when you send out the invites, I think you can skip her. It’s rude, but she may just forget about it. If you’re still working together I think you’re obligated to invite her. It would bee too uncomfortable when the other coworker went.

Post # 20
Member
15 posts
Newbee

Oh, these “STDs”. Aptly named, lol. 

Save the date cards were contrived by wedding stationery people so they could sell you something else. They cause all sorts of problems in the long run and serve absolutely zero purpose. 

The people who are closest to you will already know your wedding date before the invitation arrives. The people who aren’t are usually the ones who get burned by these STDs. Couples send these things out requesting that people arrange their future plans around their date and then don’t invite them in the long run. It’s spectacularly rude. 

If couples must use these STDs, then they should settle their guest list before they go out. If you’re not sure who you’re inviting and don’t think you’ll have a solid list until close to invitation time, don’t use them. 

If you have out of town guests you really want to be at your wedding and would like to give them a heads-up out of courtesy, then write them a note, or send an email, or call. Hell, tweet them. It’s a lot less trouble than sending out slews of STDs and then realizing you can’t invite some of those people, who may have saved vacation days or spent money on clothing or a gift for you. 

Just say no to the STDs. Good advice. On many fronts. ;~)

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