(Closed) NOT JUST COLD FEET

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
Member
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t think you should get married.  Some of the things you have said here are so mean, I’m not sure why you ever got engaged in the first place.  You should break it off – he deserves that much.

Post # 5
Member
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think you should walk away. You are clearly not ready to spend your life with this man, and while it will hurt him in the short run, it’s the only fair thing to do for him. You don’t even seem to like him.

Post # 6
Member
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

You can’t force yourself to love someone because you think they’d be good for you.

If you don’t love him, don’t marry him. It’s not fair to either of you. He deserves to be with someone that loves him, not someone stringing him along because they’re afraid they can’t do better. You deserve to be with someone that makes you happy and satisfies your needs.

Post # 7
Member
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It sounds like he’s not what you need or want. I wouldn’t drag things out any longer. Call off the engagement. It’s the hard, but brave thing to do. You will find true happiness when you’re with the right person. Don’t let anyone pressure you into a marriage you know in your gut is not right.

Post # 8
Member
2192 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Wow. Please don’t marry him. He doesn’t deserve that. A lot of what you said is very mean and hurtful.

Just leave so you can both find ppl that actually love you.

Post # 9
Member
1526 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Honestly, it sounds like you have already made up your mind.  I think writing a page essentially bashing the man you agreed to spend the rest of your life with is a pretty telling sign.

I have to say though, I find the whole part about him being framed for your murder both insanely dramatic and somewhat distrubing.  I wouldn’t have called either if you walked out and didn’t call for three days.  Why is he the bad guy for not calling when you didn’t call him either?  It is just as immature to leave a fight (in a snowstorm, nonetheless).  If you love someone and care about them you face your problems, not run away from them.

I am in no way trying to bash you.  I just feel bad for this poor guy who, by your own words, is nothing but a stand up guy.  He isn’t your physical type and has attributes that you do not find attractive so you bash him completely on WB?  It sounds like you would be doing both of you a favor to just end it now.  Why would you even consider marrying him under false pretenses? 

Post # 10
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I feel so bad for your fiance. He deserves someone to love him unconditionally

Post # 11
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Sunset Harbour

Seems like you want a typical ‘alpha male’, and your guy doesn’t fit that.

Also, I think it’s pretty messed up that you got mad that he was stunned and disoriented after a car accident and asking if you were okay. What exactly did you expect him to do?

Post # 12
Member
2288 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

As usual, I think Elvis hit the nail on the head. You both deserve to be with someone that you adore. Right now you’re on this site bashing him because you’re feeling frustrated and trapped, not because you’re mean. This obviously isn’t the right guy for you, and you’re obviously not the right gal for him.

Please end it.

Post # 13
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee

@Crisark:

Ditto and if it takes waiting till your 40 to find the right guy, so be it.

Post # 14
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@coldfeet81: But what kind of woman walks out without saying where she’s going. You’re just as guilty, if not moreso, of childish behavior in this instance.

You should leave because no one can truly build a life with someone they don’t respect. As for the sexless part – check out Savage Love to see what happens when partners want sex but a marriage is sexless. Save yourself both some heartache and leave now.

Post # 15
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I wouldn’t plan a wedding now.  It’s good that you are seeing a therapist to put this into perspective for you.  If he sounds so opposite to you, I’m curious to know how did you have a relationship that lead to engagement?

Post # 16
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

“If you don’t love him, don’t marry him. It’s not fair to either of you. He deserves to be with someone that loves him, not someone stringing him along because they’re afraid they can’t do better. You deserve to be with someone that makes you happy and satisfies your needs.

 

What she said!!

The topic ‘NOT JUST COLD FEET’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors