Post # 1
My engagement has been a long time coming, and ive been engaged before that never made it to the altar. In the years between high school and my final engagement, all i have thought about was “wedding wedding wedding wedding wedding”. Ive driven my parents and other family nuts and my friends even distanced themselves because of it. Now i am engaged, almost a month in. This time, its the real deal. My parents love him, his parents love me, and we are mature enough now that we can make it work. And we have our own home, so no apartments for us.
I have all of these old wedding plans, and multiple binders all around my room, several spreadsheets on my computer, literally all i have thought about for six years is my wedding.
The thing is, now that i have a real engagement ring on my finger, and the wedding gets closer every day, i have not touched my wedding binder since the day he proposed, and that was only to record his proposal story. I have not done any wedding plans! How could i be so obssessed with weddings, for so long, and now that i have a legit reason to be, i couldnt really care less? I am more obssessed with my new house than anything to do with weddings! Perfect dress and shoes to match? Meh. New trim? Hell yeah!
this is not normal!
Post # 3
Maybe it’s a case of you always want what you can’t have is my short and sweet answer and now you know it’s within reach the intense longing of waiting for it to happen wanes a bit
Post # 4
@TheSpoons: i think reality has hit you, finally you know the outcome so you can stop dreaming, i’ve been engaged before and i had loads of wedding stuff picked out i planned everything (even before my first engagement) like you i never looked back on any of that, the reason for me is that was the wedding i wanted with someone else. not the man i love now, i refuse to take any aspects from that wedding and i threw all my planning books out.
but your wedding appears to be over a year away, there is still time, and if your really still not bothered nearer to the time hire a wedding planner 😉
Post # 5
@TheSpoons: that’s how I was – I’d been mentally planning my wedding for SO long…and then I finally was engaged and didn’t even want to think about a wedding. Don’t worry, you’ll come around – I did! It took almost two months, but I just started getting the itch – all I want to do is look at wedding stuff and start writing checks!
Post # 6
I think fake wedding planning is usually more fun than real wedding planning. Fake planning usually invovles pinterest and blogs and looking at dresses. Real planning involves getting tons fo estimates and figuring out the drama of guest lists and stuff like that. So I’m not really surprised. Get yoru house settled and then you can dive into wedding stuff.
Post # 8
Fake wedding planning is also all about your fantasies and what you want. Real wedding planning is bound up with the realities of marriage. You have to factor in two people’s ideas, preferences, wishes, etc., and work out disagreements that might arise. Plus you have to juggle all the complications that real-life factors like families, real-life limitations like budgets and availabilities, etc., bring into the mix. Different ball game with different rules.
Post # 9
Fake wedding planning you can have anything and everything, real wedding planning you have to actually think about budget and costs and reality. I think maybe you’re just scared to look back into all the things you had previously planned and realize that you can’t have everything.
Post # 10
i dont kno, maybe you girls are right. I thought i would be so ecstatic when i had a real engagement ring and a real wedding on the horizon, and i am happy, but im happier about getting to spend my life with him, not the wedding. The wedding i really dont care about anymore. Maybe ive just matured and realized what is important? Who knows?
Post # 11
@TheSpoons: Yes, this.
Fake wedding planning is all about having a wedding. But now you’ve got the real thing, and you’re focused on the marriage, the man himself, your relationship. I’m sure you’ll still enjoy planning your wedding, but I think it’s sign of maturity that you’re not dragging out the binders 🙂