- 7 years ago
- Wedding: December 2011
First off, hi! This is my first post, so I apologize for the length and all.
I’ve been lurking on Weddingbee for several months now. (This is one of the sites that have kept me going while my boyfriend was in basic training and now at tech school) I’ve just made an account since my boyfriend and I are getting much closer to and much more serious about getting engaged and married.
Through my lurking, I’ve read lots of posts where members have given support and much needed advice to those in the hive. Well, I need some help and advice please.
For a bit of background, my boyfriend joined the Air Force back in August and we’ve been together for nearly two years. He’s coming home for a couple weeks for Christmas Exodus and we’re planning on getting engaged then. We’ve also talked about it and plan on getting married sometime next year. =) So things are going pretty well since we’re mostly on the same page.
We’re on the young side (me 21, him 20) but we’re both old souls and mature for our ages (at least that’s what we’ve been told). We’re such prudes: no drinking, no partying, not really anything that other people our age do XD. However, let’s call him “R”, is much more minimalistic than I am. I love sparkle and he’d much rather avoid it, especially in our rings.
A year into dating, R bought us each a matching James Avery silver band to wear on our right hands as a sign of commitment. He was certainly not ready to get married yet but he wanted an outward sign that we were together and committed to each other. It’s a little uncommon, but we have our matching commitment rings. (I haven’t taken it off since he gave it to me).
In any case, R wants us to get another set of our bands in gold for our wedding rings. I have absolutely no problem with this. However, he wanted to get the bands when he comes home for break so that he and I can both wear ours. The problem I have with this is that I was really hoping for an engagment ring. R just wants our bands and that’s it.
It’s very, very fickle and my sister has called me really old fashioned for this, but I really wanted to have an engagement ring on my finger. R and I even talked about it before and when asked, I told him I wanted a ring with a 6mm blue moissanite center. Some sort of plain banded solitaire ring.
He says that we can by the stone for my birthday though. But when I told him I wanted it to be set into a ring, he sort of got offended. He said he’d rather get two and set them into a set of earrings… but I was hoping to save the stone for a bit and maybe do an anniversary ring with it since I’ve come to terms with having no engagment ring. I guess he might feel like I don’t think the band is good enough or anything like that, but I really do. I planned on having it as my wedding band from the start. =(
I love him to pieces and I don’t want him to think that I’m unhappy with what he wants to do. I told him that I’ll be fine without an engagement ring and just wear the band if it would make him happy. He’s offered to get me my blue moissanite stone for my birthday. But, he’s not fond of the idea of setting it into a ring later. I don’t fully get why not though.
Any ideas of what to do? Help… I don’t know whether or not I should just drop my hope of setting my blue moissanite into a ring or if I should stick to it. It’s a very silly problem to have, but it’s been weighing on my mind for weeks now.