- 6 years ago
- Wedding: December 2015
Long time lurker. First time poster. I’m not sure if I qualify as a waiting bee.
Let me start off by introducing myself. I am 26 will be 27 by the end of this month, my SO is 36. By the end of the month we will have been together for a year and a half. We both have full time jobs, I live in an apartment with a roommate and he lives by himself. This summer we made a trip to meet SO’s family who lives across the country.
After our first year anniversary SO asked me my thoughts about buying a house and moving in together. I explained to him that I could not live with a man unless we were engaged with a set date or were married. (I respect the those who do live with their SO’s, it’s just not for me).
We talk a lot about our futures together but in vague terms, in the future or one day. we have also talked about when we have kids, when we get married, moving to a different state to live in the future. I told him I’d like to start a family by the time I am 29/30. We have agreed on 2 kids, 3 tops. he knows that none of this will happen unless we get married. We talked about weddings, I told him I’d like a courthouse wedding, he wants an actual wedding, we compromised we would have a small wedding when the time came.
He’s mentioned starting to look for a house next spring. It just happens that my lease is up then and it would be a perfect Ike to make it official! But I do not want to get my hopes up and i will just focus on me. I do not want to be let down. SO isn’t much of a planner he probably didn’t put two and two together.
I want to have the timeline conversation with him. I came here hoping to get some moral support. I know some of you will say if i want to be married to this man I should be able to talk to him about anything. And I agree, I just need that moral support.
My sister got engaged earlier this year and is to be married next month. The last thing I want to do is make my SO feel that I just want to get married/engaged because I want what my sister has. We are both in the bridal party. I feel like I can’t approach the subject until after that has passed. On the bright side her wedding has opened the doors to many of our conversations.
What do you bees think? Should i wait it out until after the end of the year? Or have the timeline conversation with him now?
P.S. One of SO’s coworkers asked him about our relationship. So happened to mention I was 26 and SO’s coworker said that we didn’t have to rush into getting married. He had plenty of time due to my age. This comment make me ridiculously furious. We aren’t getting any younger. How dare this woman speak for me. I find my reaction funny now, but at the time this made me upset.
On the other hand all of our friends support us as a couple and think it’s only a matter of time before we tie the knot.