(Closed) Not sure what to call our wedding attire

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What dress code for our outdoor, vineyard wedding
    Casual : (1 votes)
    2 %
    Business Casual : (10 votes)
    24 %
    Smart Casual : (25 votes)
    60 %
    Informal, but classy : (6 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    838 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2008

    Why do you have to mention an attire at all? Unless it’s black tie, allow people to wear what they want. I’m assuming you know and invited people who can dress properly for a wedding without being told….

    Post # 5
    Member
    822 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Agree with DJones69

    You dont’ hve to mention anything.  Most people know what to wear to a wedding.

    Post # 6
    Member
    20 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    You are describing business casual. If you have a wedding website, I recommend putting it in the FAQ section with lots and lots of pictures to help people get an idea. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    4803 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    @DJones69:  +1.

     

    And if anyone is going to show up dressed inappropriately, unfortunately those are usually the people who would ignore such a note. But none of the weddings I have been invited to ever mentioned dress code unless it was going to be very casual or black tie. Otherwise people just use common sense…I didn’t put anything about dress code on our invites, and most guys wore a dress shirt/pants and most of the girls wore dresses. Is there some reason you forsee this being a problem with your friends/family?

    Post # 8
    Member
    2462 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I wouldn’t say business casual because to me, that implies professional-looking clothes, like no short skirts, sleeveless or strapless, etc, which are things that I think would be appropriate for a wedding. I think “smart casual” gets to what you’re describing

    ETA: though, “smart casual” usually leads my dh to wear nice jeans and a sport coat when we go out to dinner at a restaurant with that description, so if you don’t want jeans you maybe should say semi-formal. I don’t think he’d wear jeans to a wedding, but if you really want to avoid them I’d err on the more formal side of the spectrum

     

    Post # 9
    Member
    838 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2008

    @VineyardBride105:  Then you’re going to worry about them regardless. Besides, I know some people who would take business casual and turn that into jeans and a nice top and although that may be appropriate for an office, I don’t particularly think it’s appropriate for a vineyard wedding, no matter how casual it is. 

    So don’t mention attire. They’ll get the idea. Outdoors at a vineyard. A nice summer dress, men with slacks and a shirt or a suit. No one is going to turn up in a tux.

    Post # 10
    Member
    3736 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I googled “smart casual” and saw things similar to business casual. I voted “smart casual” too since it seems to flow more with a wedding than the words “business casual.” People in the know will figure it out. However, people who don’t care will still come poorly dressed – not sure if mentioning this will help those family members you are worried about. If they don’t know how to dress appropriately in most cases, you will probably suffer the same fate UNLESS mom, dad, aunt or uncle pulls them aside and helps them figure it all out.

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    360 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Smart casual or informal dress.

    I agree that if you just put casual that people will think they can roll up in god knows what! Take a look at Emily Post’s website on wedding etiquette. She does a great job of breaking down what each definition includes and doesn’t…and you can pick from there. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    2379 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I like smart casual personally.  It flows better and it gets the point across. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    5407 posts
    Bee Keeper

    Yeah I agree with PP. I wouldn’t write anything about dress on your invitations. If you have a wedding website, you could put plenty of pictures under recommended dress but I don’t think most people will show up too far either way. If it’s family you’re concerned about, could you just talk with them and explain?

    Post # 15
    Member
    1583 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    use resort casual wording.

    Post # 16
    Member
    64 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I faced a similar situation and decided not to mention it at all… I too was worrired about certain family members, but then I decided it wasn’t worth the energy worrying over. If they are dressed more causually than I would like, it doesn’t reflect poorly on our wedding day. Hopefully, because they know and love me, they will try at least a little, but the important thing is that I want them there to celebrate with us, no matter what they’re wearing!

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