Post # 1
I need some outside opinions on my current situation, because I’m honestly not sure if I am in the wrong by feeling the way I do…
I will start by saying that I adore dogs. I absolutely cannot get enough of them- big ones, little ones, slobbery ones, short hair, long hair. I love em all!
I graduated from college last year, and could not get my own because I didn’t have enough money to support myself, let alone a dog. I have been waiting (impatiently) since then to get one. I work at a shelter, which has made the wait both easier (tons of dogs to play with) and harder (It’s hard not to get attached sometimes).
Now, I am financially able to get my baby, and I picked my little girl out of a litter that was born at the shelter a month ago (so it will be at least another month before I could hypothetically take her home, should I choose to go through the adoption process.)
Here’s the issue: my boyfriend expressed hope that I would wait to get a dog until we could get a dog together. His reasoning being that he wanted it to be OUR dog, not just mine or his. I see his reasoning, but we are not anywhere near to being engaged, and he doesn’t want to live together until after we are married. I am DYING to have a puppy to nurture and love. I love this puppy. She is the sweetest little thing and loves cuddling into my arm to sleep.
I don’t want to disregard his feelings, but I also don’t really think he is being fair. My question is what would YOU do in this situation?
Post # 3
Just get the dog…. it will be “both of yours” once you get married! You are not married to him yet nor are you even near to getting engaged according to what you said: therefore you are free to do whatever you want. Get the pup!
Post # 4
I kind of understand where he’s coming from, but at the same time it’s a ridiculous request. It’s not as if the two of you can’t get another puppy together in the future. Go ahead and adopt your furbaby, with whom you’ve obviously bonded, and remind your SO that there will be more puppies.
Post # 5
You shouldn’t put your life on hold waiting for something that may not ever even happen. I would get the dog. I might have involved him in picking out the dog as a gesture, because if you are together long term he would be spending a lot of time with the dog, but that ship has sailed.
Post # 6
Get the puppy. If your in a relationship you can still share it and she will be both of yours. if hes involved with picking her up maybe and then the training, he might feel she belongs to both of you
Post # 7
I got a dog when I was living seperate from my boyfriend (now fiance). I think if it’s what you want to do you should go for it. We ended up getting a second dog about 6 months after we moved in together. The funny thing is the dog I got while seperate from him absolutely adores him .
Post # 8
Get the puppy. I adopted a cat while living with Fiance (then BF) and he is my cat. I pay for all his food and vet care. We are LDR this year, and I adopted another cat. When I adopted the second cat his response was “so this means I get to pick out our dogs when we have a house right?”
Post # 9
You already organized to get the dog, so don’t back out now just because your boyfriend got upset, she will be both of yours once you live together!
Post # 10
Get the dog. Its what you want.
Post # 11
Get the puppy. DH and I each came into our relationship with two dogs. Even though I only raised two of them from puppies myself, I love all four equally, as well as the cat we raised together from a kitten.
Post # 12
“we are not anywhere near to being engaged”
How would you feel if you were say, 5 years away from being married? That’s 5 years you could have spent with an adorable dog huh?
Get the puppy. It’s his problem for not wanting to move in with you (which, by the way, I disagree with but that’s another story).
Post # 13
Get the puppy. If you’re not even near being engaged what is to say you will ever get engaged to this guy? You could break up in a year and regret not having gotten her. He’ll deal with it.
Post # 14
As everyone has said, get the puppy. Once you live together is will belong to both of you. I had a dog before I met my SO. Despite years of her being only my dog, she is totally his dog too now that we live together. We also got a second dog shortly after we moved in together, but that one is in no way more his than the other.
Post # 15
I’m sorry I don’t see an ounce of logic in your Boyfriend or Best Friend thinking.
Post # 16
Get the puppy…. I had 2 cats on my own and FH made it quite clear they would always be MY cats. Well now 4 months after the kitties and I moved into his house, he feeds them, plays with them, cleans after them and spends an awful lot of time cuddled up with them. The puppy will belong to both of you eventually regardless of what he says now.