(Closed) Not sure what to feel……….

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Could you maybe go the Mossiy or Asha route? They are cheaper, which should make him happy, but you still get your ring.

Post # 4
Member
2286 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: Central Park

I second the pp. look into cheaper stimulants that give the same look. You can always upgrade later. 

Post # 5
Member
1120 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

I think he is being responsible with your money and that it is good.

But I also think that buying no ring at all is kind of extreme and you could compromise on an inexpensive ring for the moment. You are just starting out in life and have all your life in front of you… You can always buy your dream ring later in life once you’re established and the ring doesn’t cost 15% of what you own.

As for people telling you that the ring shows that he treasures you… I personally think it’s a load of crap – sorry. He treasures you enough to save money to ensure you have a nice life and savings. That’s what makes for a happy future together!

Seriously, talk to him and agree together on a compromise ring if you don’t get high paying jobs.

(And by the way, both my Darling Husband and I have high paying jobs and my e-ring, wedding set and his wedding ring all together cost less than 1000$. We have a very happy marriage and he treasures me plenty! Cars and house are almost paid off and we can afford for me to be a Stay-At-Home Mom and fulfill this dream of mine. Plus, we travel a lot and make great memories.. I see plenty of people with rings “better” than mine, but I can assure you that I wouldn’t be happier with something similar)

Post # 6
Member
4518 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Do YOU want to get legally married in court after graduation without announcing your engagement to people? That sounds sad to me. If I were getting married, I’d want everyone to know, ring or no ring. It wouldn’t be that awkward to explain. The ring can come later when you’re more established in your careers and earning more money. 

Post # 7
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That would actually piss me off! A ring is important to you, so it should be important to him. Period.

 

 

Post # 8
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

His sister is silly…an engagement ring has nothing to do with how much you’re treasured.  It’s a symbol to the rest of the world that you’re betrothed.  I think your boyfriend has a good head on his shoulders. 

Also, you might want to lower your expectations a little bit and get what you can really afford righ tnow.  Plan on getting the “dream ring” when you’re more financially stable.  πŸ™‚

Post # 9
Member
77 posts
Worker bee

Etsy has a lot of cheaper options that are under 1K, some of them are even diamonds. You could always get your “dream ring” for a 5 or 10 year anniversary present. But I agree with stillme that you should think about what you want and are happy with. Also, talk to your parents. At first I didn’t think mine would pay for a wedding, but when I sat down and talked with them, they wouldn’t think of anything else. So just talk to your SO, tell him what you want, and then ask him the same. Hugs!

  

Post # 11
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Why not just put off getting married until he gets a job? Once he finds a good job, he can buy you the ring and you two can plan the wedding you want.

Post # 12
Member
3688 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I bet you can do that ring for less than 3k. Have you heard about the Pricescope forum? They mainly deal with diamonds, but there’s a section for gemstones. People over there are super knowledgable about jewelry and can help you find the best deal possible.

When my Fiance and I started looking at rings, I was skeptical about buying an engagment ring on the internet. However, when we started comparing the prices, buying online is ridiculously cheaper than buying a ring at a mall store or another brick and mortar store.

Post # 15
Member
9673 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

He has a point about saving money for the future, but nothing at all is too extreme.  You two should be able to work out some sort of compromise here since you really want one.  Are you getting the type or engagement and wedding you want?

Post # 16
Member
504 posts
Busy bee

I think you should be honest with him about wanting a ring. Maybe let him read your post so he understands if you have a hard time explaining. But you should be able to be honest with your feelings.

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