- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2013
Please excuse me if I ramble a little. I’m relatively new to the board.
My boy and I have been together for almost three years, living together for almost as long. Near the beginning he asked me when I would hypothetically hope to be engaged and married if I were in “the right relationship,” and I said I’d like to be engaged after two years. We talked about getting married in the summer of 2011, and obviously that didn’t happen; we’re not even engaged yet. I was very disappointed that he didn’t propose after two years, but I think he’s only recently understood how much it’s been bothering me. He’s said he will propose for sure by our third anniversary (in September) to show me how committed he is to spending his life with me.
So… we’re taking a trip to the Maine coast this weekend. He does not like to travel (I love it), but he proposed taking this trip a couple of weeks ago, shortly after I had a mini meltdown. We have been talking about rings and when to have a wedding since then. Last Friday morning he asked me more questions about the type of ring I wanted. We had talked about getting a (very small) three-stone ring. He called me from work later that day to ask if I would go shopping with him on Sunday so he could be sure to get me one I would be happy with (and that would fit me). We went and I tried on a ring with that I absolutely loved. He said, “that’s the one we’ll get, then.”
Today, Tuesday, he asked me again if I was sure I wanted a three-ring and not a solitaire. I’ve said over and over that I’m not fond of solitaires. I also tried some on and far preferred the three-stone. I’m kind of frustrated that he keeps asking about the ring, as it means he definitely hasn’t bought one yet. I suppose he just wants to buy me one I’ll really like, but as I told him, the ring is secondary; yes, I want him to spend his money on something I’ll love, but the most important thing is taking the next step towards spending the rest of our lives together.
This makes me think that he didn’t plan this weekend as a proposal trip, but other things suggest that he did. I think he looks so cute when he has a bit of a beard, but he rarely grows it out because he thinks it looks unprofessional. He’s been growing it out and says he’ll let it grow for a while longer, even though his coworkers have commented on it. This sounds really dumb, but I think he’s growing it out for me. He also said in passing that he mentioned proposing to me to a college friend of his. It’s also kind of amazing that the ring seems to be on his mind so much lately.
My question to you all is not so much “do you think he’ll propose this weekend,” but instead how do I focus on enjoying the trip and spending time with him instead of obsessing about whether or not he’s about to drop to one knee? My birthday is next week, so this trip could very well be about that (which is super sweet in any case). We are going to a party on the evening of the 4th, and I expect to get calls from family and friends on my bday. I’m trying not to allow myself to think about how awesome it would be to tell all of those people I love that I’m now engaged.
Ack, how do I keep myself focus on how great the here and now? I’m terrible at that, so any suggestions would be welcome!