(Closed) Need some advice. What do I say to dad?

posted 5 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 4
Member
3421 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

Be clear and transparent with your soon-to-be-FI about your dad’s plans and weither you should tell your dad to come or not. Your Fiance should be in the loop. Tell him that “No” IS an acceptable answer in this situation.

Then you gotta tell your dad not to count chickens before they hatch

Post # 5
Member
714 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@ERsax:  Definitely let your Dad book the tickets. And maybe even tell your Mom about the discounted airfares as well so that she doesn’t feel like you caused her to pay more than she needed to (or more than your dad). I know how weird it is to plan without officially being engaged, I did it as well, but it making things easier for your family will make it easier on you.

As for not freaking out your bf… I was about a year from when we wanted to elope, and 3 months before he was going to propose, and there was a wedding expo with a huge dress sale on. So I casually said “so there’s this wedding expo next week with a lot of discounted dresses, how would you feel about me going?” I totally thought that he’d run for the hills, but instead he said “sure!” (I even asked him again and again because I thought maybe he just hadn’t heard me) Then instead I went dress shopping at a couple local boutiques and got a great deal on my dress, but he didn’t even freak when I told him he wasn’t allowed to go in the spare bedroom closet cuz that’s where my dress is!

I think you should go ahead and help your family plan their travel, and just be open with your almost-FI. And congrats on the upcoming engagement!!

Post # 8
Member
714 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@ERsax:  Smart girl to pay it off a little bit at a time! I put mine on VISA and never looked back haha! It may feel a bit awkward planning now, but I wouldn’t worry about it. if he told you to start planning then you’re fine. Plus it’ll get even better once you acutally have the ring. I worried that planning before I got a ring would ruin the engagement, but it was still perfect and I still bawled like a baby!

Post # 9
Member
3260 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I can appreciate how you feel. I truly can. But if you guys are planning to spend the rest of your lives together, I can’t see why you can’t/shouldn’t talk openly about this. If he asked you to marry him you’d say yes, right? And you don’t have any reason to think he won’t ask you, right? And you’ve done some preliminary planning, right? So, while you may not yet be engaged (and I think you two should have the engagement YOU want to have and not glaze over it because it doesn’t seem necessary), it is perfectly appropriate for the two of you to discuss together what plans should be made. He loves you and wants to commit to you. Why should your bringing up something he truly wants to do cause him to run for the hills?

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