(Closed) Not Waiting

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

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sweetaslemons :  “A while back I posted about not being sure about his kids. The kids who I would rather schedule dental surgery than spend time with due to the fact that they hate ME now, when they used to love me, as long as I was dad’s friend, not his gf?”

This sounds rather toxic- for you as well as them. I realize your feelings toward them stem from their treatment of you, but it’s still a major concern. 

It sounds like his kids see you as a mistress/homewrecker. You say in your opening paragraph that your friendship with him was inappropriate while the two of you were both unhappily married. Even if this was a symptom of an unhappy marriage rather than the cause of the marriage unravelling, the latter seems to be how his children and his ex-wife see it. And if the ex-wife is bitter, she’ been fuelling her own children’s animosity toward you as well and has put you firmly in the ‘other woman’ category, even if this hurts her children more in the process. How is your partner handling the children’s feelings toward you? A lack of communication could extend to this as well and if he hasn’t already spoken to them, it seems long overdue. 

Post # 17
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2020

Follow your intuition.

Post # 18
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

If you really are ok with waiting. There is no need to explain much more. You and you SO know the relationship better then anyone else. Good luck!

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