- 8 years ago
- Wedding: November 1999
Hi there Waiting Bees,
I have to tell you, a lot of your posts have the most passion and emotion I’ve seen out of most of the threads that come out on these boards – and I commend you. As a woman our emotions can be ALL OVER the place, and when it’s something as big as this – well all bets are off. I see the posts where you feel bad for bringing something up engagement related, or spend countless hours wondering – when when when?! You know what?
I envy you.
I bet you probably would have not thought someone engaged would say that to you, but it’s true.
As romantic as some my find my story (we went to high school together, major crush, I left for the military, we kept in touch, eventually between the 1,500 miles we found ourselves both single (albeit 10 years later!) and he told me the first time we ever talked on the phone he would “marry me” – that was Dec 07, he moved from our hometown to Texas in Dec 08 and proposed in April 09) it’s not how it can sound on paper.
Him knowing what he wanted right off the bat was utterly sweet. He was not shy at all about expressing the fact that he wanted to get married. And, yeah, that was great. We sort of told our friends and family that was the plan before any kind of real proposal happened – I was also firm about not moving in with him until this kind of agreement was established.
But… there are times when I wish I didn’t know. I wish I had no idea about what he wanted or what his intentions were or when they would happen. The suspense and the intimacy that can come with something like that was completely missing. The waiting, the EXCITEMENT and palpitating heartbeats were not there.
Don’t get me wrong, I was still happy. But even sometimes through the agony in your posts I’m jealous of the suspense and even myriad of feelings you’re experiencing!
I know sometimes “waiting” can be looked at as a not-so-good thing. But it is such a special, special time in your relationship – please try not to forget that. You will never get to go through this magical time of suspense again.
I think ya’ll ladies are just wonderful and I always look forward to hearing about the ups and even downs – and even happier when I see when we can cross you off the list!
So from me to you, congratulations on waiting 🙂
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle,
When 24 hours in a day is not enough;
remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
and start to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
H e then asked the students again
if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand
and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded
With an unanimous ‘yes.’
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table
and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
‘Now,’ said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things – God, family,
children, health, friends, and favorite passions
Things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else —
The small stuff.
‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued,
‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are
important to you.
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
There will always be time
to clean the house and fix the dripping tap.
‘Take care of the golf balls first —
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’
One of the students raised her hand
and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled.
‘I’m glad you asked’.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’