Not walking down the Aisle

posted 9 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 4
Member
7081 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

We’re not doing a father daughter dance and as for walking down the aisle, I’ve decided to have my parents walk me half way and then go sit down.

I think you can do whatever feels right to you!

Post # 5
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee

My husband (fiance at the time) and I walked down together. i don’t know anyone else who has done this but it really worked for us.  First, I wasn’t ‘property’ being given away, Second, it showed us as a couple/team and finally we shared the limelight. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Post # 6
Member
497 posts
Helper bee

I wouldn’t forgoe the whole walking down the aisle thing…only because people may chatter and then you will hear murmmuring in the crowd and that won’t make you feel any better.  However, I do like the concept of walking WITH your fiance to the altar. 

Post # 7
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Actually we were debating the same thing too. Being slightly shy folk, the Fiance and I were reluctant to walk down the aisle. Add to that my extreme resistance to anyone ever daring to ‘give me away,’ and well. But then we thought about our guests and how they expect an aisle walk. It begins the ceremony, it gives people a chance to see the bride’s dress (which is why I think women go to weddings ;-)). So in conclusion, we’re walking together, which means we get pre-ceremony time together and it doesn’t privilege the bride over the groom.

Post # 8
Member
14183 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

It’s not necessarily that you are property and your dad is giving you away if that’s your reluctance about it.

Think about it like I do. I’m not property and nobody GIVES me to anyone. Heck, I refused to let my Fiance ask my dad for his permission. My dad is simply helping me transition into a new phase of my life and acknowledging that my Fiance is becoming my husband. He is walking me to support me, to show that he is happy and approves of the man that I have chosen. But he certainly is not GIVING me to my FI! I’m not for sale

I love the idea of walking together, I think it’s way sweet and perfect for a shy couple. If you don’t walk out, nobody will know where to see you! I think not walking down the aisle as the bride might make it more awkward, like Corn said. You’ll acquire more attention that way =]

Post # 9
Member
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Straight from 2000 dollar wedding (one of my fav blogs)…

"We didn’t walk down the aisle: First of all, there wasn’t really an aisle to walk down. I worried about it for a few seconds ("Maybe we can rent a nearby cabin, hide out in it, and then walk down the "aisle" to start the wedding?") And then I realized, "Wait a second. I don’t actually want to walk down an aisle. I’ll already be nervous about speaking in front of everybody; I would rather forgo the expected aisle altogether." We simply pulled up in our car, got out, and started mingling with our guests. I was nervous for about two seconds. Then I saw my good friend, Luis, and got overwhelmed with love and affection for him. I pretty much stopped being nervous. People were definitely staring at me and checking out my dress, but I was too busy talking with people to notice too much."

 She crafted a very meaningful ceremony, picking and choosing traditions. Check it out here!  I think its inspirational.

Post # 10
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

i love the idea of walking down the aisle together… i was trying to figure out what to do, but i think i’ll be stealing that idea!

Post # 11
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Okay, well I’m totally on the side of: you can do or not do most anything you want, nothing is really required.

But, I also have one question regarding this. How does your dad feel? I don’t know what your relationship is like but you are basically thinking no to walking with him down the aisle and no to a father daughter dance? My dad would be heartbroken, believe it or not dads think about their daughters’ wedding days too and for him, he might think he is "losing his little girl". Are they any other ways you are going to recognize your dad? This was my only concern…. yet your situation might be totally different than my relationship with my dad so disregard my thoughts if not relevant.

Post # 12
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I’m walking in with my fiance, as well. That being said, if my father were alive, I would absolutely be walking with him. Not because he would be "giving me away", but as a sign of transition in my life. I loved my dad and it is going to be pretty hard getting married without him there.

Post # 14
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

hmm well you have a lot of time to figure it out! you may find you change your mind a lot. I’d actually talk to your dad at some point and see what his thoughts are. He may not mind, but you never know! Keep us posted.

Post # 15
Member
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

i have no aisle to walk down either! i’m getting out of car (which i’ll be driving myself), walk a short distance to the french bistrot where my FH will meet me outside of, and tadaaah, our guests are there 🙂

Post # 16
Member
145 posts
Blushing bee

No ideas on how to avoid walking down the aisle, unless you’ve got a teleporter.  😉 

We’re not doing the father/daughter or mother/son dances either.  It would just feel awkward and kind of creepy-incestuous to me (especially cause I always see brides and their fathers dancing to some weirdly inappropriate love song).  We are doing our first dance together and that’s it.  I don’t think anyone will bat an eyelash.  

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