(Closed) Now I know why people hate being a bridesmaid

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

@Legallyblondiebride:  planning a shower and bachelorette party

I thought that was the maid of honour’s job, not a “lowly” bridesmaid…

Post # 5
Member
1508 posts
Bumble bee

If the wedding is a potluck, then isn’t everyone, including guests, supposed to bring a dish? Not just you and the others in the wedding party? You sound pretty rude to be honest. This is a really special time in your friend’s life. You say the only thing you had your BM’s do is purchase a dress… how do you know tHEY don’t think it is fugly and a waste of money??? You need to calm down and enjoy this time with your friends.

 

Post # 6
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Legallyblondiebride:  Word. haha

Never again will I be a bridesmaid (besides my brothers wedding but I’m taking the backseat). My first experience as my friend’s co-MOH (nightmare in itself). There are so many things which stir up drama its just ridiculous. Ya know at first you’re all excited and stoked to offer up stuff for the bride and then after that first and second then third lack of a thank you its like F this. For as much grief this causes and the stress on my wallet- I think I’ll support your marriage as a guest.

Post # 7
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

Well, then why make her MOH? That title comes with a “job” and if she can’t do it, then she shouldn’t be one! Anyways, I guess that’s my opinion….LOL

I certaintly wouldn’t pay $200 for a dress I will not be wearing again. Do you have a picture of it to show?

Post # 8
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

I’ve never been asked to be a bridesmaid, but I got to be personal attendant for my one my BFFs (she had 4 younger sisters as BMs – so I was really the only one able to plan a bachelorette party for her). While I wouldn’t be happy about the potluck, I would LOVE to be able to help plan the shower, bachelorette, and whatever else she needs help with (provided she’s kind and asks nicely).

Frankly, if I didn’t want to do more than buy a dress, I would say no to being in the wedding.

Post # 10
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I love planning and participating in weddings…but doing it and trying to do your own wedding in the same timeframe would be a nightmare. 

I think my biggest Bridesmaid or Best Man complaint came from my sister — she didn’t get her favorite dress, we decided to go with her #2 dress…

Post # 11
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I remember you posting about the pasta making earlier, and felt bad for you!

Honestly, if my friend were really having a hard time paying for a wedding, I would be more than happy to help bring something (manageable). But it seems like your friend’s priorities are a little out of whack. I mean, she can’t afford a caterer, but wants her BMs to buy $200 dresses? That’s not really fair. 

Sorry you’re having a rough time. It’s no fun to be stressed when you’re trying to plan your own wedding!

Post # 12
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Legallyblondiebride:  I think this is the root of your angst and it is completely justifiable. You’re a Bridesmaid or Best Man, not a caterer. If she can’t afford food, she should find a different option than having the bridal party provide it.

Post # 13
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@Legallyblondiebride:  Preparing food isn’t your job, and I would have balked big time at that.  Personally, if I had been asked to do a dessert, I probably would have b/c I love baking…but being told to make something for 100 people is ridiculous and not really what you’re there for.  I would call Olive Garden and order some trays of spaghetti and deduct that from her gift.

Post # 14
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Legallyblondiebride:  Making that much food IS a nightmare.. vent away.. that is NOT your job. I understand about the ugly dress.. I did that, close to $300 for my ensemble. A full gown with pick ups and such. No assuming I would ever wear that again. 

Post # 16
Member
981 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Pasta + Jarred Sauce + Cheese = Your Famous Secret Recipe Baked Ziti!

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