Post # 1
There was a discussion about what you consider TTC on another thread and it got me thinking about the debate of if NTNP v’s TTC are the same thing.
In some ways I think they are are one and the same and in others I think there is a difference. The reason I say this is because I don’t consider myself TTC at the moment but I’m not using any contraceptive either.
For me the difference between NTNP and TTC is that when my Darling Husband and I have sex at the moment, we are doing it for simple purpose of having sex, we’re not doing to make a baby but we’re not using protection either, on the premise that we’ll be starting to actively try in a few months so if we got pregnant now it wouldn’t change anything we’d just prefer it to be a little further down the line, and if somebody asked me how long we’d being ttc I’d say we haven’t started trying yet.
What do you think?
Post # 3
I think you can be TTC without charting/temping/etc., and I think there’s a difference between TTC and NTNP. It’s not really a black and white thing, they’re degrees of trying
Not really trying (NTNP)
Sort of trying (TTC without charting)
REALLY trying (TTC with carting/temping/etc)
Post # 4
I consider us to be unofficially TTC. I am using opks to monitor O but not charting, and I never tell dh when I get a + opk because I don’t want us to be focused on it, I want us to bd because we want to. After a few months, if we haven’t fallen pregnant, we’ll talk about officially TTC, which to me means temping and planning bd around O. I’m also still regulating post-bcp, so I don’t want to officially TTC yet. That said, if it happened I’d be ecstatic!
Post # 5
There are some people on this board that are adamant that NTNP is the same as TTC, and some of them get kinda huffy about it. I think that’s a little bit ridiculous.
For me, there is a difference in that people that say they are NTNP are fully aware that there is a chance they will get pregnant, and are happy with that. They just don’t want to say TTC because they are not temping, charting, actively TRYING to get pregnant. They are just leaving it up to chance.
I am somewhere between NTNP and TTC lol. We are not charting but I pay attention to my cycles and CM and do try to BD during what I hope is the fertile window. But since I’m not temping and charting I have NO idea if I’m actually ovulating and if so, when.
Speaking of which, I think I’m in the window right now and we BD’d this morning and I plan to attack him a couple times this weekend, so FX! 😉 … ok, maybe that does constitute TTC hahahaha
Post # 6
To me, regular unprotected sex = TTC. There is no NTNP/NTNT.
There are degrees of TTC, from simply ditching the birth control and having sex whenever you feel like it without regard to your ovulation date, to the full-court press of charting, temping, OPKs, etc. And everywhere in between.
I feel like people can be reluctant to label themselves as TTC, and find the NTNP/NTNT label more attractive, because nobody wants to think that making a baby is something they’ll have to work at, and the very phrase “TTC” conjures up images of non-spontaneous, scheduled sex. Very clinical and not most people’s idea of romance. Plus, long before any of us were ever ready to be parents, we had it beaten into our heads over the years that “all it takes is once” and one slip-up WILL leave you pregnant no matter the timing. So nobody likes to think they’ll really have to try.
I’m always a little baffled when bees say they weren’t using any protection (or were regularly being lax about it) and they’re so shocked to wind up pregnant because “we weren’t even trying!” We all know how babies are made.
Post # 7
there is a difference to me. i’m gonna go for the emotional aspect… instead of the technical one.
if you are NTNP then you are pretty much fine no matter what… you don’t mind if you aren’t pregnant and you don’t mind if you are. both are good.
but if you are TTC, each BFN and AF is another heartbreak because you ARE trying so hard.
Post # 8
i think of it this way:
TTC= We want a baby now! Sooner the better! not neccesarily with OPKs or charting or even planned BDing. BUT if you are doing OPKS and charting and planning BD, then you are MOST CERTAINLY TTC. IMO
NTNP = We would like a baby soon. Let’s see what happens in the next few weeks/months/ year.
You can be totally ready for a baby but do the NTNP thing, but as @rosworms: said, if you get a BFN while NTNP, then you are pretty much TTC emotionally. 🙂
Post # 9
@rosworms: That is exactly it to me! I think it is a mindset, the NTNP people are so much more easy going, they are not stressing about O and DPO-they are just living their life and having unprotected sex, maybe even knowingly during their fertile time. They may be using this time as a buffer to get to know their cycle or because they don’t want to freak out a partner who wants this to be a little less stressful than planning a wedding. In short, it is entirely possible for one partner to be TTC and one to be NTNP.
The TTC people are actively searching out their fertile time and doing what they feel is reasonable to try for a BFP/healthy baby. They may choose not to drink at all, avoid caffiene, hold their breath when walking past smokers, drink fertility tea, temp, chart, use OPK, etc. They know exactly what DPO they are and are doing their best to distract themselves and live their life until they can test. Each POAS is viewed with a magnifier (or squinting in the brightest light possible), lines are analyzed as evaporation or faint, posts are created and each BFP/BFN is shared with many other women who have never met IRL.
NTNP people are much more laid back and I really wish I had the personality to be one, but I’m a little type A and once we decided to do it, we are both in it 100% to get it done.
Post # 10
@sailor: I totally agree with this! very well articulated. even though i didn’t initially agree with your first sentence, i see where you are coming from, and can totally get on board with the spectrum of TTC idea.
@rosworms: yes, i think a big difference between the two is how you feel about getting AF/BFN. when i feel a serious disappointment, i will def consider myself TTC.
At the moment i’m doing OPKs not to determine my fertile window for BD but to understand my body and see if it appears to be working properly. and i was happy about getting AF last month because it was confirmation that my body was returning to normal. and yet, i think i would have been even happier with a BFP…ahh who knows!
Post # 11
@rosworms: What you say about the emotional aspect makes total sense (never heard it articulated that way), but are there really any couples having regular unprotected sex who don’t feel at least a little bummed when AF arrives? Not necessarily devastated/ruins your day/drown yourself in wine and ice cream… but disappointed. Or is it all just degrees of disappointment depending on how much effort you’re putting in?
Post # 12
@sailor: I completely agree with you. I see TTC as a spectrum, so any time you have regular, unprotected sex with the full knowledge that you might get pregnant, that counts. Maybe NTNP should be considered low fat TTC and charting should be considered whole fat TTC. You can TTC without charting, scheduling sex, taking OPKs, etc, but I agree, many women seem to prefer the NTNP label because it somehow means their sex will be spontaneous and fun as opposed to the horrible, mandatory sex we official TTC ladies have
Post # 14
@sailor: In response to your question to rosworms… I see women all the time on here who consider themselves NTNP, think they might be pregnant (I’ve decided having unprotected sex automatically makes women think they’re pregnant), and then are really disappointed when it turns out they’re not. Maybe disappointment is tied to how much you really want a baby at that time. The women I mentioned above figure out that they really do want a baby right now once they think they might be pregnant, so they’re disappointed. Most of the women who are charting, testing, etc REALLY want a baby, so obviously they’re devasted when it doesn’t happen.
Post # 15
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
NTNP = Not Trying Not Preventing
TTC = Actively Trying to Conceive
The difference is that TTC ladies are generally doing something active to try to get pregnant like charting or taking OPKs or having sex at certain times of the month. NTNP ladies are not using any birth control but really not doing anything else other than having unprotected sex so they may or may not get pregnant. Personally we plan to NTNP for 6 months when we are ready to get pregnant because I really don’t want the additional stress I equate with TTC. If after 6 months we aren’t pregnant then I will chart and actively TTC for another 6 months before considering whether I need to be an RE.
Post # 16
I think they are the same thing in technical terms, but do agree with the point raised about the difference in emotional approach.