Post # 1
Darling Husband and I have been married for just a month but have been discussing having children even before we were engaged. So we have now decided to go off of birth control. I got pregnant while on the pill and miscarried last spring. I will admit that I have struggled dealing with the grief surrounding the miscarriage.
I have this underlying fear of miscarrying again even though, this time around, I am setting up my body for success. We are using condoms for a few months in order to build my uterine lining, I am taking prenatal vitamins, and have changed my eating habits, etc.
I was just wondering if there is anyone else out there who has had a similar experience and then a successful pregnancy? Did you feel scared? If so, how did you cope with those feelings? If we do get pregnant I don’t want to be scared for the first months, I want to feel excited and I’m afraid it won’t be a happy time, but more fear filled for me. 🙁
Post # 3
I have not gone through this but I have seen my sister go through this.
I think there is a natural nervousness for all women that they will not carry to term. This nervousness is obviously amplified when you have had a miscarrage.
My sister, who had a miscarriage. eventually got pregnant again and went on to have beautiful healthy baby girl just last month. She took lots of time to get over the initial miscarriage and she held on to the fact that the miscarriage was nature doing its job. (as cold as that sounds). She, much like you, set her self up for success the second time around. She finally got to the point where she decided that if she miscarried again it was just simply out of her control.
I think what you are feeling is totally natural. As a woman you can only do so much to prep your mind and body for a baby. The rest is simply out of our control.
Sending many positive thoughts your way for a successful pregnancy when you guys are ready to take that next step.
Post # 4
@panterapeach: thank you. I just can’t seem to push the icky thoughts out. I really appreciate the success story.
Post # 5
I got pregnant while on the pill three years ago and miscarried. I’m now starting TTC also, and I totally know how you feel. I can’t shake the feeling that my body just wasn’t meant to carry a baby to term. But we just have to keep reminding ourselves that TONS of women have miscarriages and then go on to have healthy pregnancies/babies! Good luck!!
Post # 6
My mother had at least one miscarriage before she had me, but when she had the miscarriage she wasn’t even aware that she had been pregnant. My grandmother also had a few miscarriages and then had perfectly healthy children.
Post # 7
I had three miscarriages before I had my son. Two of them were very early and then another one was at 10 weeks. It was very hard… I have no problem getting pregnant… but I have a lot of trouble staying pregnant. It didn’t help that pretty much everyone I knew was getting pregnant and carrying their babies to term. I shed a lot of tears and began to think that it was never going to happen. Luckily I got into the doctor when I was around 5 weeks and she immediately put me on progesterone, she didn’t even run any tests or anything… just gave me the prescription and told me to take the stuff. So here I am now typing away with my almost 8 month old sleeping beside me. Stay positive and never, ever give up hope. Most women don’t go through what I did so you will probably have no problem the next time around. Good luck and have fun trying!!
Post # 8
I recently miscarried, and then became pregnant again shortly after. I don’t really have that great of advice for you, b/c I have been, and still am, absolutely terrified. The first 12 weeks were the worst. Of course I was excited, but I tried not to allow myself to become too excited or get too attached, just in case. I’m also struggling b/c I am super excited to have a new baby on the way, but I’m still sad and grieving for the baby I miscarried. Right now I’m 14 weeks, and so far so good. It felt amazing to go to my 12 week apt. and see a baby in my belly with a strong heartbeat! I also had trouble coming to terms with telling people I was pregnant. I know it should be an exciting thing, but I kept thinking that right after I tell people I will just miscarry again, and I didn’t want to deal with that. So yeah, like I said, not much help. But if you ever want to talk to someone who is going through it, PM me!
Post # 9
I miscarried last year and we’re allowed to start ttc again now. My first ovulation is in about 1 1/2 weeks and we’re so excited, but I’m petrified, too! I totally understand! I know that if/when I get pregnant, I’ll be so scared the first few months. I think it is very normal to feel this way. Try to think good thoughts and really take note of all the success stories on here and everywhere else. Remember that statistically, most women who miscarry, DO go on to have a healthy baby!! 🙂
Post # 10
My mom had my brother, miscarried, and then had me. I think it’s wonderful that you’re prepping your body for TTC. Have you talked to your doctor about your feelings? She/he may be able to direct you to some helpful resources for your physical and emotional well-being.
I hope everything works out for you! Sending thoughts and hugs your way.
Post # 11
@northernazbride: thank you. this was the story I needed to hear