(Closed) NUNYA!!

posted 9 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Sorry, I´m not the most polite girl. If I was put in that situation, I will just lie and say I haven´t done the math yet. I actually know a couple that say they didn´t want to know the total, I don´t know if is true but no one asked them anything else about budget.

 Hope this helps 

Post # 4
Member
652 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

i just say too much and if they ask again i will say again too much until they stop asking ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
18 posts
Newbee

I’d say–I didn’t pick my florist/caterer/etc because of how much they cost, I chose them because they do such wonderful work. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
1045 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2008

You could just look at them sweetly and say "That’s a bit of a strange question.  Why do you want to know?"  ๐Ÿ™‚

Or any of these choices, and then just change the subject:

"Luckily, we’re squeaking in just under budget!  So anyway, have you heard about that new blah blah blah…"

"Oh, our cake baker?  I’ll send you her contact info so she can get back with you on pricing.  Are you having a party?"

"Oh, you’d have to ask Fiance.  He’s our budget police!"

"More than we’d hoped at first, but luckily, we’re good little savers!"

"A little less than we’d anticipated!  We’ve gotten some really good deals!  So anyway, have you seen that new movie blah blah blah…"

"Oh, photog ABC?  She has a wide range of packages, so she really can meet any budget."

OR, you could just scream NUNYA in their faces!  ๐Ÿ™‚  I like that approach.

Post # 7
Member
2000 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I think it depends … if it’s someone who might be interested in using their services and you really don’t want to talk about the $$, I think jhphi offers a great option:

"Oh, our cake baker?  I’ll send you her contact info so she can get back with you on pricing.  Are you having a party?"

You could remain vague and noncommittal. Or you could just be upfront and say that you’re not really comfortable discussing money.

Now, I’m a reporter, and we’re trained to ask how much things cost because our articles are often about governmental entites and all their financial information is public record. So I have to say that I’m the nosy type who would be asking you these types of questions. If you’re really uncomfortable EVER talking about money, you should make that clear so that the person knows not to as you again, IMO.

Post # 8
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I think it depends.  My Maid/Matron of Honor and I are getting married just a few months apart, so we were sharing some budgeting numbers for a while.  But she knows so much about me, my life, how much I make at my job, it’s whatever. 

I think offering to send contact info is good, because they probably don’t really want it.  I think people ask because they’re curious.  I know for me, before I was engaged, I didn’t realize how much things cost.  I wish now, I had paid more attention!

Post # 9
Member
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I had this problem with my family asking how much things cost, then using that info to gossip and say bad things about us. They either thought we were spending too much or too little. I asked them to stop gossiping, and they did it again. So my fiance and I decided we would not tell anyone any more prices. They kept asking and we just said, "I’m sorry, we’re not sharing that information." My mom got SO MAD and kept pressing me for why. Finally I told her, "Because you can’t keep a secret!" and she burst into tears and stopped speaking to me for a week. SHEESH!

My advice is to set boundaries and be consistant in how you enforce them, but also don’t be surprised if people don’t want to respect your boundaries.

Post # 11
Member
1045 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2008

I think when you’re talking to someone engaged, they’re probably just looking for some help and guidance!  You could definitely give them a range, and be like "I think her current packages start at about $2k, and then work up from there…"  But if it’s someone like your snarky uncle, who just wants ammo to criticize you about your overspending behind your back, I would just lightly brush the question off in a way that shows them it’s rude to ask: "Oh, I’ve learned never to discuss money or politics– I just get myself in trouble!  So, how’s Aunt Bessie’s pottery class coming along?"

Post # 12
Member
10218 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

I definitely would say packages start at xyz or I will send you her info, she/he is awesome.

Post # 13
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Or you can make up a ridiculous sum, this sends the message jokingly that it is no one’s business.  I have had several people ask what I spent on my dress, my response is always $100,000.00. 

Post # 14
Bee
1048 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009 - City Hall

I agree with those who said you should reply with "too much!" or "you don’t even want to know."

The only time I actually share how much something cost is if a fellow bride-to-be asks me. It helps them plan their budget – and often prices of packages and such are really difficult to get flat out from vendors.

Post # 15
Member
1428 posts
Bumble bee

Ditto maryjane! Unless it’s a close friend or a bride-to-be I would go with "you don’t even want to know". My fave when I get questioned about the price of something (my car/purse/shoes/house) tends to be…"just what I was able to afford" or "ohmigosh, I don’t even remember what I paid for …"

Post # 16
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I agree with being vague, but willing to give contact information for vendors if they are interested.

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