- 5 years ago
I’m going to condense this down the best I can, so please bear with me!
My Darling Husband has a Masters in Finance and workings in a high-end bank, therefore thinks he knows everything about money. I let him control our joint finances although we don’t get paid into that account, we both transfer money in so we still have some financial privacy. I DON’T like being policed about how or where I spend money so this works for us.
I racked up a sizeable credit card debt 2 years ago that I was making minimum repayments on and not getting anywhere. I would through $500 here of there when I had it, but would spend it back. Darling Husband would ask how I was going paying it off and I would say good.. which was a big fat lie. I am going to be starting school in a month and knew that on my reduced income I would only be able to make the minimum repayments and again would not get anywhere.
I asked Darling Husband what he thought about me refinancing into a personal loan (which was for a similar interest rate but I cannot re-spend the money once it is on the loan) and he said we would talk about it later. Later never came and I decided to go ahead and apply. It got accepted, my credit card has been paid of and I have a payment schedule in place that I can easily meet while working reduced hours. When I go full-time over uni holidays I will put more on it.
I haven’t told Darling Husband I have done this and I feel a great amount of guilt:
1) I essentially did it behind his back. Even though this is my money and my individual debt we are a team and I know this decision should have been made together.
2) He offered the other day to roll my credit card onto his and I just pay him what I could when I could. I said no because I want to pay this off myself, I got myself in this mess and I need to get myself out.
3) He printed off a joint application to get an overdraft on one of our accounts as we are shuffling our budget around- on the application it my assets and debts LISTING THE PERSONAL LOAN. (I didn’t think the bank could give out information to him on accounts his name isn’t on!!!)
Anyway, I am feeling very guilty and very nervous and I don’t know how to tell him I have done this. I know he will feel like I didn’t respect him and should of asked his opinion but sometimes I like to make decisions myself, and I got myself in this mess.. (he told me not to get the credit card) and I want to get myself out of it.