Post # 1
This is really just a vent because Ive been so frustrated and havent been able to talk about it much. I thought of the idea of doing Shutterfly photo books for our Grandmas for Xmas of pictures from our wedding since I couldnt really think of much else. I knew in the back of my mind that my SIL would probably be doing it as well (her wedding was October), but she had never actually mentioned anything and I didnt even think she might do it until after I thought I wanted to do it. So I told Darling Husband about the idea and while he wasnt TOTALLY on board, he liked it if we couldnt come up with something else.
So about a week ago SIL was saying how she got gifts for the parents, she did large Shutterfly wedding albums and she was waiting for the Grandma’s books to arrive. I told her we were thinking of doing the same thing and she didnt really say anything but I could tell it bothered her.
I talked about it with Darling Husband later and he agreed that we should be able to still do it because we both got married this year but that he would ask his moms opinion. So he talked to her and she said to do it and he said “are you sure, you know how she is about stuff like this…” and his mom said yeah you’re right, Id wait.
So we are giving it to them for Valentine’s Day but Im just frustrated that we cant do it too. I guess we could but I dont want her to be mad – we have a mostly good relationship though I get annoyed by some things she has done as well. I wanted to do a scrapbook and get it printed for everyone last year of our trip we took the year before but couldnt because she was getting a Shutterfly album printed for everyone…Just frustrated I guess. I think it all stems from her being upset I “took” her wedding colors – didnt know I swear, she wanted light blue and chocolate brown and I did a teal/turqouise and brown. She wasnt even engaged when I picked my colors! TOTALLY different blues, wouldnt have even looked the same and she ended up changing hers and I think she will never really forget that even though she ended up loving her colors.
Anyways, thanks for letting me vent. Am I in the wrong here for being upset/frustrated about the albums and having to wait to send them? You can be honest I swear (maybe I am wrong and just need to be told that from other people!) 🙂
Post # 3
This would be the one rare case that I don’t see anything wrong with you guys giving the same gifts. After all, you BOTH got married this year. You had totally different colors…heck…totally different weddings. I think the granparents would cherish both albums equally….and that’s what really counts.
Post # 4
I think you should be able to do the photo album. I think its kind of common knowledge that any year you get engaged, married or have a baby your preseents are probably going ot be pictures. It kills two birds with one stone.
If you decide not to do the photo album maybe you could get a picture of “the family” from the wedding framed and give it as a gift so it is a little different.
P-S.- She sounds a little wrapped up in herself. Sorry you have to deal with that.
Post # 5
Um.. what?? I am scratching my head. You both got married this year, your Gmom loves photo albums and you aren’t allowed to give one to her JUST because SIL is? How old is she like 10? Why the heck does it even matter? That is one of the most trivial things I’ve ever heard. I don’t know why your Mother-In-Law was even consulted on the matter! I would just order the sucker and gift it with a smile!
Post # 6
I guess I just feel like we are always in competition, and some of that blame has to fall on me as well if Im the one who feels that way. She’s never come out and said anything (except with the wedding colors and it was non-chalant in the beginning, how she always thought Id do purple – which I always thought too until I saw the teal I ended up picking)
I think she was a little surprised we sent our holiday cards with our wedding picture on it because they were doing it too. I originally wanted to do another picture but decided it was the only year we could really send out a holiday card with our wedding picture on it and we could do “regular” pictures for every other year. I think all the little things here and there have just boiled up inside me. Im not necessarily MAD, I still like her and we get along great, but sometimes I just have that nagging feeling in the back of my mind.
And now that Im saying this, even though we arent copying her, I can totally see how someone else might think that especially after reading so many posts on here from brides who cant tell their friends details about their wedding because they will steal them. I guess Ill just have to chalk it up to “great minds think alike” and let it go? And remember that we will have an awesome unexpected Valentines Day gift to send to them?