- 8 years ago
I think it is better I share this, somewhat anonymously, here… rather than to my friends, Mr. Taco, or family. There have to be some Bees in my situation, or some that have been…
*sigh* Well, here goes.
I am 26, and because I came from a family who didn’t believe college was necessary, I began working immediately out of highschool (I had to drop out my senior year because said family did not bother to see if records would transfer in our state to state move. I was demoted to freshman.)
Luckily, I got into a field that pays relatively well, considering I don’t have an education. It is a field that dwindles, though, and I have now found not only do I not have job options other than where I am working (other companies has gone out of business), but I have no leverage to move up. I would need to get an MBA to stay here and make the money I want. I also work for a company who has continually lied about their intentions with me, and I am frustrated and burned out. They then took away a great deal of the extra responsibilities I enjoyed, which I believe happened because my manager felt threatened.
I am going to college next fall, to begin my Associate’s degree so that I can completely pre-pharmacy courses and hopefully get into pharmacy school. I am trying to save enough money so that I can quit ASAP, but it doesn’t appear that will happen until the end of June. I hope to hang on as long as I can.
I’m frustrated that as a “gifted” student, I have forgotten the most basic mathematic operations. I am taking a placement test this Saturday. I’ve been studying, which also frustrates me, because I have never had to study before.
On top of that, once I leave my current job, I have no idea how it will be not to have money. I like to look nice and take care of myself, which costs something. I would like to wear newer clothing every quarter. Not expensive, just a few things from Old Navy or H&M that are appropriate for the season. Transportation to see my friends will cost money. Having lunch will cost money.
A part time job would work, but I have friends who can’t even find that. A part time job as a pharmacy technician would be nice – I’ll need to get a license, but there is no way to get “in”. Most companies hire from within their retail platform and pay the techs to get a license.
And what of Mr. Tacos? He is the most wonderful person for encouraging this. But what happens if he doesn’t want to date me?
I know I have to do this. That I can say for certain. But I’m in a total funk now and again because it is a huge sacrifice to leave everything that kept me stable and trust someone else to be there.