- 6 years ago
- Wedding: March 2014
I have had a strained relationship with my grandparents for several years now because of the way they are and the way they treat people. When my mom got remarried after my dad passed, my grandmother slapped my mother, called her a whore and told her that my father would roll over in his grave if he knew what she was doing. All of this happened when I was 13, and it’s only gotten worse since then.
My grandparents are the type of people who think they are better than everyone else. They can’t stand any of my other family members (my dad’s side of the family or my stepdad’s) and they also think that FH is “below me”. They showed up to FMIL’s wake to judge his family, so yeah, pretty crappy people. They also have to know what my stepbrothers got me for Christmas like it’s some kind of competition on who gave the best gifts. It’s ridiculous. She also likes to remind me of how my dad’s side of the family has treated me like crap and all but forgotten that I exist since my dad passed away, because I need to be reminded?. My grandmother is also the guilt trip master. When she found out I got another puppy, she started to cry and said that I took all the help she’s given me for granted because I have another dog to waste money on. She also commented about how my floors must be filthy and I probably live in a pig stye. Right, because I let my dogs and cats poop all over my house and I don’t clean it up… When I got my nose pierced, she also cried and told me that I didn’t love her anymore or I wouldn’t have done it and that my mom was a horrible person for taking to me to get it (I was 18, she couldn’t have stopped me anyway) My grandparents have given me a little money over the years, but they’ve given it to me so they can hold it over my head. They gave me $5000 when I bought my house and they then tried to tell me that I needed to get rid of all my animals since they helped pay for the house and they wouldn’t have pets in their house. They don’t give to be nice, they give because they feel like I’ll have to do what they say if they give me any money.
My weight has also always been an issue. My grandparents never hesitate to remind me that I’m “pleasantly plump” and on my way to being obese (I do weigh 200 pounds right now, but I’ve lost 15 pounds recently, so I’m proud of myself). I buy clothes that I think make me look good, and then they tell me that I should be wearing a muu-muu until I lose an amount of weight they find acceptable.
Anyway, I recently failed a class and got kicked out of the school program that I was in and I have to wait one year to apply. I’ve decided to look for a full time job because money is tight with FH being the only one working. My grandfather told me that if I started working that I wouldn’t go back to school and that I’ve wasted a lot of years not doing anything and that if I didn’t have pets (or FH) I probably would have passed the class. It’s upsetting. I have worked my butt off for 5 years and true, all I have to show for it is an associate’s degree in science, but I never really knew what I wanted to do with my life, so I took my basics and took some classes in different things to try to get a feel for things. Now that I’m out of the radiologic technology program, I’ve decided that what I originally went to school for (molecular biology) is what I really want to do and where I belong and I’m going to set the steps in motion to get back into that program. I have two years left to finish that degree. I’m excited about going back, and then my grandparents come in and make me feel like crap. It’s not like they paid for my college education, my dad’s life insurance policy did.
This kind of stuff is constant. My grandmother just called me to tell me not to be eating any leftovers since it was late and I didn’t want to undo my weight loss. Seriously?
Commiserate with me. I know I can’t be the only person with really negative people in their family.