Post # 1
Bees, i need some advice.
My mother is an alcoholic. She drinks to the point of slurring her words and stumbling around everyday. My Dad, chooses to ignore it, and occasionally mutter a comment to my siblings and I. My siblings and I speak of it behind her back, but it’s never EVER brought up infront of her.
My mom is now in heart failure after two heart attacks, and she continues to drink.
We don’t know what to do. I don’t even know what i’m asking, i’m just desperate to find the right answer. And i’m scared…very scared
Post # 3
if I were you I would talk to her. I know that may stir up a lot of drama in your family, but if something bad does happen, at least you’ll have the satistfaction of having tried. If you don’t say anything to her or try and get her to change, I feel you’ll really regret it if her health continues to decline.
Post # 4
It sounds like she needs professional help. Maybe you can stage some kind of an intervention? Is there a family support group in your area (Al Anon?) that can maybe help you with that?
I’m sorry you’re going through this. The health issues sound very, very scary.
Post # 5
I agree with @MissHobbit, have you talked your sibligns about the problem and having an intervertion?
Above all else I think you need to get help for yourself. My stepfather was an alcoholic and it was horrible strain on my mother and myself. Please conisder visitng a local chapter of Al-non.
Post # 6
I hope you’re able to make it to some Al-Anon meetings. I’ve heard it’s really helpful support group – my Grandma was a severe alcoholic and my Mom stilll attends Al-Anon despite the fact that my Grandma passed away several years ago. Hopefully you’ll receive some good advice from the people at the meetings. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this.
Post # 7
I agree with other PPs. My dad was an alcoholic so I understand what you’re going through and I know it’s not easy. You guys NEED to step up and speak with her as a family, she needs help and so does your family (Al-Anon is a fabulous idea, it’s not just for teens). It’s not going to be a pleasant intervention and she may not listen; the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. You and your family need to band together to support each other and stage an intervention.
I’m so sorry you have to go through this, I know how hard it is =( Feel free to PM me.
Post # 8
I also agree with the family intervention and speaking with her. When you speak with her, be sure to use statements like “It makes me feel like ___ when you do ___”. Avoid any sentences that start with “you” as this may make her feel like you are attacking her. It’s also more productive to state your own feelings on the situations and not be accusatory.
I have also attended AA meetings with my grandmother who is in recovery of a marijuana addiction. Although she didn’t have problems with alcohol, any type of anonymous meeting is a wonderful experience for anyone to be a part of. They really are wonderful places of support. Perhaps you could even check one out by yourself and instead of sharing that you have a problem, you could share that you are here on behalf of someone else who is not yet able to accept the responsibility for their own choices. I bet a lot of people there would be able to help you and will be able to give you their side, the side of addiction, and how it has affected them seeing it tear their own families apart.