NWR – What's your theory on text etiquette?

posted 1 year ago in Relationships
  • poll: What is a reasonable amount of time to answer a friend's text?
    24 hrs (1 day) max : (65 votes)
    58 %
    2 days max : (16 votes)
    14 %
    a week : (5 votes)
    4 %
    whenever I want/never : (26 votes)
    23 %
  • Post # 16
    Member
    9811 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Usually within 24 hours but to be honest sometimes I read it and can’t respond immediately and then I forget it exists (especially if it wasn’t a significant message or question).  I have 2 small kids and don’t really sit down until 9pm.  Honestly, most of my friends have little kids too and I have noticed they are also slow to respond sometimes and all of us seem to understand and no one is hurt over it. When I know I have plans to meet someone or expect to make plans I will definitely check and make sure I respond quickly.  Just depends on the message

    Post # 17
    Member
    5112 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2014

    Aside from extenuating circumstances (lost phone, out of service area, travelling, 24 hour shift work), I don’t see any reason that it should take more than a day to respond to a text which requires a response, even if it’s just to say “I’ll get back to you later on that”. 

    I will generally respond to a text as soon as I see it. If it’s something I’m not sure about, but will be within a couple hours, then I may wait until then to respond. If it’s something that I will not be sure about within a couple hours, then I’ll still respond to let them know that I’m working on an answer. The only time I wouldn’t respond within a few hours would be if I really don’t want to talk to that person, but then I’d probably just not respond at all.

    Post # 18
    Member
    4497 posts
    Honey bee

    Just because technology gave us near constant instant access to each other does not mean I am obligated to let you have near constant instant access to me.  Back in the day, people called and if you weren’t home it would just ring and ring and they would just try back later.  Or if you were on the phone they got a busy signal.  This whole needing to communicate every thought the moment we have it and expecting an immediate response mentality that came with this technology is unnecessary in my opinion.

    So emergency – I would guess most people would call.

    Time sensitive and important – within a day or two depending on the time frame involved

    Everything else – within a few days to a week or sometimes not at all.  Some things I just view as an FYI or “Saw this and had to share” and don’t respond.

    Post # 19
    Member
    3740 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

    I don’t like having loose ends and I like to deal with things as they come up, including texts. I usually respond within a few minutes of reading the message. The only exception is with really needy customers, I delay responding so I don’t get trapped in a lengthy (non-essential) conversation and they realize I’m not at their beck & call. 

    I drives me nuts when people don’t respond, it lets me know where I sit in their priorities and that sucks. I understand that people are busy, but if you’re on your phone reading the message, why not just reply right then instead of trying to remember to reply later? Even a simple, hey, work is busy, call/text me tomorrow would make me happy. 99% of the time if I read a message and don’t reply right away, I wont remember to go back and reply. I would much rather a “I don’t know, I’ll check with so-and-so and get back to you” than being ignored. This is what I do as I don’t like to leave people hanging.

    I do have friends that are busy moms and occasionally respond in their heads but are on their phones a lot. So sometimes if I don’t hear back for 1/2 a day to a day, I’ll text back and ask of they responded in their heads. It’s pretty much always a yes or “my kid must have read the message, I didn’t see it” lol.

    Post # 20
    Member
    10020 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I’m glued to my phone constantly and use it for work as well as personal.  I answer texts immediately and mostly get immediate responses, too.  I voted 24 hours but it depends on the circumstances.

    Post # 21
    Member
    508 posts
    Busy bee

    I have 82 unread text messages on my iPhone. Does that answer your question? LOL I never answer texts unless it warrants an actual response.

    Post # 22
    Member
    530 posts
    Busy bee

    I am glued to my phone & have it on me 24/7. I always reply to texts immediately…especially if they are really important ones & mostly get immediate responses too. I voted 24 hrs but honestly it all depends on the circumstances though! 

    Post # 23
    Member
    181 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    avprobeauty :  I find it rude AF if I’m addressing someone and they don’t respond to me in at least a few hours, a day. Kinda like if I make direct eye contact with someone and offer a “good morning how are you” I expect a response back, not a rude stare and silence. I just don’t get why it’s so hard for people to be nice and respectful….I’m one of the most time-locked people I know so I’m not kool with a “how busy” people are excuse….texting takes like 1.7 seconds. 

    Post # 24
    Member
    1962 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2017 - Pearson Convention Centre

    If I get a text message while I’m at work I will respond on my lunch or when I’m leaving work. If I get a text message while we are having dinner I will respond after dinner. 

    Post # 25
    Member
    76 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2018

    it depends on the person and the topic i am having with my friend. if it’s not that important, i won’t reply as much. but yea sometimes you just want to talk to them since you are now apart and won’t meet anytime soon

    Post # 26
    Member
    1 posts
    Wannabee

    I’m usually pretty quick to respond to a text no matter who it is. No quicker for family/friends than for acquaintances/work-related texts. Of course if I’m at work or busy doing something where I don’t have my phone on me, it might take a little bit longer for me to respond. If I don’t see a text until late at night, I will wait until a reasonable time the next morning to respond. It might take me a little longer to respond if I have to talk to someone first before I respond ( for example, talking to my husband or checking my calendar before I agree to fill-in additional days at work ). But since most people are checking their phones many times a day, I wouldn’t wait several days before responding to a text. Even if I didn’t have an exact answer yet, I would respond so they know I acknowledged their text and just say I’ll get back with an answer as soon as I know. I’d say I probably answer most texts within an hour or two, but definitely within 24 hours since I don’t want people to think I’m ignoring them. 

    Post # 27
    Member
    31 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2020

    i guess it depends on:

    -. how long do you take to reply to theirs or they replies you

    -. how urgent and important the topic is

    -. what time are you guys having a conversation

    -. where and how busy you and your friend is

    Post # 28
    Member
    394 posts
    Helper bee

     Agreed with the PP who said if info is needed, then ASAP.

    I’m really flakey with ‘hi, how are you?’ type texts… I’d try to respond within a week, but I’d much rather e-mail.

    Post # 29
    Member
    545 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    It depends on the person. Some people are just bad at texting. I don’t think it is rude when it is just part of their character. If it is a group chat, there are other people who can respond. If it is important, they can text more than once or call.

    I’m super bad at texting back. I rarely instigate text conversations and often forget to text back. 

    Texting has less pressure and less required of it than phone calls. 

    And if someone isn’t responding and it’s bugging you, just say something.

    Post # 30
    Member
    32 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2019

    since i myself is a fast text responder, i would allow myself only up to one day maximum to reply to people. but i know not everyone is the same though

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