Post # 1
Fiance and I were discussing this the other day. He is all for spanking under EXTREME circumstances yet I don’t think there is ever an excuse to spank your kid. I’m sure it has something to do with the fact that I was never spanked growing up but Fiance was.
What are your thoughts, Bees?
Post # 3
Here’s my post from the other thread reposted here:
My fiance is also okay with spanking under extreme circumstances. I on the other hand think that there are a lot of other ways to discipline children before spanking (I’m not judging anyone that chooses to spank their children). I just personally would rather use other methods of punishment and consequences because from my experience other means are usually more effective (and were on me as a child).
Post # 4
I think a swift swat to the bottom is called for when a young child is doing something very bad. Not to hurt them but to sort of ‘shock’ their system.
If a child is very young and you can’t explain to them in detail why what they’re doing is dangerous, then they would probably respond more to action rather than words.
I do not believe it is necessary to put a child over your knee and repeatedly spank their bare bottom though.
Post # 5
I was spanked as a child and I’m not emotionally scarred or anything so spanking my children is definitely on the table. I’d say “extreme” circumstances for me would be being disrespectful or endangering themselves (i.e. if you run into traffic I might smack your butt so you remember not to do it again).
Post # 6
I voted for under any circumstance–but I would never take spanking to the extreme. I figure if my mom spanked me, her mom spanked her, etc, and we all turned out just fine, then it’s acceptable to me.
Post # 7
I voted “Other”. “Under any circumstance” and “under extreme circumstance” really don’t leave any middle-ground.
I plan to spank if needed. It won’t be the first form of discipline. I don’t have kids yet, but I plan to have a progression of discipline methods. First time, verbal warning. Second time, they get a time-out. Etc.
I do have a belief that if a kid is spanked, it should only be done with the hand; no using belts or yardsticks.
Sometimes a kid just needs a swat on the butt. I know I did when I was a kid.
Post # 8
I’m in the same boat. My husband says he was spanked himself and he will spank our kid when necessary, while I think it’s a barbaric and inefficient form of punishment. We’ve argued on this quite a bit.
Post # 9
Hm..Spanking is implemented inefficiently by many parents so I don’t think I would do it. Plus, a lot of parents spank when they’re angry and that sets a very bad example to the child and some parents can get out of hand.
In my family, it wasn’t implemented very well. I also don’t think closed fists, belts, rods, etc. should be used.
Post # 10
@LGenz: I agree. I plan on spanking my kids because it worked for me. I don’t want to hurt them, and hit them any time I have a chance (I have seen some of my friends parents do that and it didn’t work well because the kids hated them).
Post # 11
My parents spanked us kids (3 of us) and they have told me many times that they made a deliberate choice to stop spanking. I think this happened when I was 4 or 5. I remember being spanked it was kinda scary. My parents realized that there was a more productive way to parent and discipline a child. I plan to not spank and utilize constructive discipline tactics.
Post # 12
My parents used to spank me, I turned out okay. So, I’m all for it if the circumstances are legit.
Post # 13
Post # 14
I was spanked a few times when I was a kid – it was pretty much reserved for when I was really, really bad.
My parents were great, and I turned out just fine! 🙂
Post # 15
My mom spanked us, but also used her own special brand on “Catholic Guilt.” I preferred the spanking to the guilt! (Don’t get me wrong, I have a great relationship with my ‘rents, but all of us Rock kids hated the guilting!!)
Post # 16
i think that there’s a huge difference between ‘spanking’ and ‘hitting’ i would never hit my children (young or grown), but if an extreme situation requires spanking, yes i would. it worked for me and my brother. it worked for Darling Husband. we are definitely on the same page as far as discipline for our children. he will never lay a hand. (neither of our fathers ever did)… we both did get spanked by our moms… for extreme situations.
also– on a tangent, my mom usually (in grade school, and scolding would not work) set up a “punishment” where my brother and i had to sit on our knees and raise our hands straight in the air. (korean punishment)… that worked well for us too…