Post # 1
I’ll make this short and sweet. We had our second child this week. Future Sister-In-Law came over with a gift. It was the outfit that I bought her daughter a little over a year ago. When I opened it, she said it was still brand new and that she had never put it on her daughter. It was wrapped, so this was not intended to be a hand me down. Do I send a thank you card for this? Fiance and I both,come from families that send them for all gifts, but it seems odd to send one for a gift that I actually bought…. I Am not really sure what to do…. Opinions???
Post # 2
Something passive aggressive “thank you so much for the outfit. my son\daughter will look adorable in it. Thank you again
Post # 3
So she knew you had given those clothes to her? Did she give you a thank you note for the outfit when you gave it to her the first time? Perhaps you can change the names and give that to her? It’s an odd situation.
Post # 4
smoocheepoo: I would probably put it on my kid, Take a picture, and text it “so and so looks fab in her outfit! Thanks aunty regifter!!”
Post # 5
It sounds like a return rather than a gift, so no, not card should be necessary for basically saying “thanks for the outfit, we didn’t like it enough to use it so you can have it back for your kid”
Post # 6
And congrats on your new beautiful baby!
Post # 7
smoocheepoo: I wouldnt do anything catty but I wouldnt send a thank you either. I gave my SILs a ton of brand new clothes ( I don’t have kids) when they had their babies, I didn’t expect a thank you note ( nor did they give one- a verbal one was more than enough!)
If you want to kill her with kindness take a pic with your babe in the outfit and send a thank you text .
Post # 8
No card needed for THAT. And no acknowledgment of the “gift” is needed even in conversation. I would be mortified and embarrassed to pull something like this off. Congrats with the new baby, and ignore that weirdo.
Post # 9
smoocheepoo: I would send a minimal but polite thank you since that is normally what the family does. I agree that it’s a bit of a strange situation, but I would do it in order to move on from it and not have it be one of those things that pops up again and causes trouble in the future. The last thing you want is to have her complain to someone else in a few months time that you didn’t thank her, then you try and explain your side of it and it comes off petty, and then suddenly it and turns into a pesky family drama. Yep, I would send the card simply to avoid potential future troubles. Good luck!
Post # 10
theatrejulia: Thanks!! That’s pretty much how I took it too. Its a beautiful outfit, I am glad to have it since I will sure use it.
Boxerlover24: It was not in any way my intention to do anything catty. I am big on thank you cards and will be sending one to other members of the family, it’s just hard to tell if this warrants one or if it should be ignored and perceived similar to a hand me down.
weatherbug: This is actually brilliant, as long as it comes from FIs phone and not mine.
Post # 11
Odd for sure, but does it hurt to say thank you? No. So I say just do it and you’ll feel better about it.
Post # 12
When you give her the item, it becomes hers. While it’s definitely odd, it’s no less of a gift. If you gave her a car or a TV and then ended up needing one of those, you’d thank her for giving those to you (I hope).
Post # 13
I would send a thank you for a hand me down. I mean this is a bit weird but it is always best to be gracious, and hey if you bought it, you must have liked it so it could be worse.
Post # 14
smoocheepoo: I agree with pp, if someone gave me hands me downs I’d thank them too. I’m wondering why it’s a big question? It is never a bad idea to be gracious. if you’re big into thank you cards and you’re sending them to other family, why not to her? If you don’t send one because you don’t deem it worthy, you won’t just appear petty, it will become actuality.
I think everyone agrees it’s odd for her to regift to the original giver, and I don’t blame you for doing a double take, but honestly just send a thank you and be done. It will be a nice gesture, it doesn’t hurt you or put you out in the slightest, and it doesn’t turn into something ugly and long lasting within the fam.
Oh, and congratulations!
anthrogrl: Horseradish: ditto!
Post # 15
Could it be that she got multiples of the gift you gave her? I would just say thank you in person and leave it at that.