(Closed) October 2012 Brides Wedding Breakdown? Anyone Else?

posted 6 years ago in October 2012
Post # 3
Member
1357 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m starting to get tired of it all as well, so I think I’m going to take a step back for a little while to preserve my sanity. I was crunching numbers today, so finances are certainly heavy on my mind, but I’m just being diligent about saving and not making frivolous purchases (and helping my Fiance budget–he’s terrible at saving!).

Out of curiousity, have you asked these people to help you in specific ways? A lot of people around me haven’t offered to help perse, but they are very eager when I have told them what they can do to make my life easier, such as going with me to the florist or helping me find a vendor or assembling some DIY. When I explained to my mother the trouble with finding cheap airfare for our honeymoon and not having enough miles a full round trip, she generously offered to pay for our tickets. People may want to help you but not know how unless you give them some guidance.

Post # 5
Member
486 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’ve had the money-wedding breakdown. I literally begged Fiance to elope, but he wouldn’t have it. At that time I was just so stressed and didn’t get why we were wasting so much time and money for this one day. It has been super hard planning a wedding out of state! Not to mention my moms money is tied up and her brothers are being lazy about pushing the bankers to give them the money because they all don’t need it right away. I have been literally doing nothing in the aspect of planning because I need the money to come through… 

I’ll get over it…I always do. I’m funny that way. I just prefer to be happy and just wave my hand and say it’ll work out haha

Post # 6
Member
87 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I have not had a breakdown yet…(though if FH does not get me the ONE last address i need soon i will lose it! LOL)…I will have one though it’s just a matter of time. Hope you are able to have the rest of your planning go smoothly!

Post # 8
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I have had a few breakdowns along the way too.  I thought we could have our wedding for like $6k but we live outside of DC and we quickly found out that wasn’t going to happen.  We upped our budget and we’re sticking to it.  We’re set — I mean it’s not going to cost too much over $10k for the wedding.  We have a friend (who is like my family) who let us use their timeshare for our Hawaii honeymoon.  So our room is only going to cost us $300 for a week (one night at this particular hotel can run between mid $200s to almost $300 a night).  She offered it to me when we got engaged and we recently booked the room.  So we have to pay for airfare but that won’t be a big deal.  Her helping us was a true blessing.  We’re so fortunate that she offered it up to us — she was not going to use it this year.  So, yay!  =)

Every time I get freaked out about the money I’d say lets just go to Vegas.  But I’d be hysterical about it when I’d say it, lol.  I mean straight up balling my eyes out.  FI said if I wanted to do that (this was before we had a venue and stuff lined up) that we would do it but only if I came to him when I wasn’t upset.  He knows it’s important to me to have family there even know my family has issues (breakdowns have occured due to that multiple times, lol).  

Planning can be stressful but in the end it will be worth it.  I wish you had more support there and that people would offer to help but it sounds like you two have things covered.  Just remember to breath and think about how amazing everything will be.  *big hugs to ya*

Post # 9
Member
5073 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

I haven’t had a breakdown yet.  But I can feel it coming.

Since Michigan made huge fireworks legal people in my neighborhood have been lighting them off all night for the past month.  No joke.  I have not slept thru the night for a month now.  I have no patience and very little dexterity.

We made it through the officiant problem okay but the next problem may sink me.   

Post # 10
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I haven’t broken down, per se, but things are definitely tighter right now than we’d like. We have a very large check that we are waiting on and were expecting so that makes things a bit less comfortable. 

Post # 11
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Had a breakdown this weekend. I deliberately left the Friday happy hour meet-up info TDB on our site because we’re not yet sure how many people will actually be in town then for our Sunday wedding. Since it was more casual — a happy hour, after all– I figured we have time to chooose a place after the RSVP’s come in.g

Fiance decided he wants to make a suggestion and names a small, sitdown-only restaurant where his mom can get vegan food. I totally lost it, asking why he would pick a place like that for an event we’re techinically inviting 75 people to, that is a “happy hour” — and why is he suddenly suggesting we host  yet another dinner? Why didn’t he read the actual description on the site before saying something like that? Tears, etc.

We had that fight twice Sunday night and then, to a degree, in premarital counseling on Monday. Awesome.

 

 

 

Post # 13
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@actime:  “No one has asked to help with anything, no one has offered to pick up any bill, no one even ask where we are at in the planning.”

If you need help, you NEED to ask for it. 

Post # 14
Member
212 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I can relate…Fiance and I are paying for everything ourselves too and it has been emotionally draining with worrying about finances constantly.  We still need to come up with about 1300.00 before the big day…which doesn’t seem like much to a lot of people but to me right now it feels like climbing mt. everest.  Fiance has been the strong one who just keeps telling me it will be ok and that it will all work out.  The biggest stress that I had to deal with and was a wreck about was our pastor told us he wouldn’t marry us if we didn’t seperate living together for the four months before the wedding.  Well we went round and round about it and tried it for 2 whole days (lol) and I moved back in.  So three months before the wedding we’re not completely sure who is marrying us.  Hang in there, it will all work out…or at least that’s what Fiance says!

Post # 15
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@best10612:  Us too! I still need to find shoes, pay for my alterations, gifts, invites, honeymoon, I’m right there with you! 

Post # 16
Member
2137 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i had it a looong time ago.. so bad that i dont even know what were doing anymore. sigh

im between just eloping, which my parents would hate me if they werent involved. or postponing for the THIRD time and getting married at the beach with close family NEXT yr…

Undecided

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