(Closed) Oh boy..here comes the opinions of family..thinking we should do this and that

posted 4 years ago in Family
Post # 3
1252 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@katiecat08:  I don’t think it’s tacky but personally I do prefer to drink from a normal glass 🙂


The hanger idea sound awesome though, I’ve seen one or two done in a venue like that in my internet travels and they looked great. One wedding I saw, can’t remember if it was in a hanger or not, but they used a parachute in order to decorate the ceiling and it looked amazing!


Post # 4
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@katiecat08:  Pretty much every one of your posts is about what your family thinks, and what your family thinks always involves disapproving your choices.  You will be so much happier if you treat yourself like the adult you are and value your own (and your fiance’s) opinion.  You are creating your own family, starting now with your engagement and wedding planning – embrace it!  It’s awesome and liberating.

Post # 5
46406 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@katiecat08:  Just plaster on that smile, thank them for their suggestions and carry on plannng your own wedding.

Most often, the family is full of praise when they actually see your vision come to fruition.

Post # 7
4044 posts
Honey bee

@katiecat08:  As soon as you’re engaged, you start to get unsolicited advice. I hear the same thing happens, when you’re expecting. Argh!

Post # 8
32 posts

Im not even engaged (yet) but SO family already know he plans on proposing. He has told me that his family has sat around and “planned the wedding” i guess they have food, venue and decorations. as sweet as they are and i know they are just trying to help i would like to be involved and have a say when the time comes. 

Post # 9
7403 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@HannahGrace:  Exactly. At some point you have to stop giving a damn about what family thinks. Especially went it comes to your personal preferances that dont impact their lives directly. Stop sharing details with unsupportive people and shut it down immediatelty when people share unsolicited advice. It really isnt that complicated.


Post # 10
559 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@katiecat08:  The  very beginning of wedding planning was the hardest part for us and our families. Everyone gets flooded with ideas, emotions are high, and people are quick to throw out yes or no responses before really looking into things. I never fought with my parents as much as I did my first month of being engaged! We all had to stop, take it all in and count everything as an “option” rather than an immediate no. After a couple months when the dust settled and everyone was able to process things a little better we were all able to agree on thing. I felt so heart broken in the beginning that everything I wanted was getting shot down by my parents, I was feeling like my wedding day was going to be nothing of my own design. Just hang in there, bit may seem frustrating now but you mom may come around. Once you get numbers and estimates from your location and starts looking like a package you can compare to her b&b package. The b&b package probably just seems easy to her everything is laid out in the package. 

Wedding are emotional for everyone involved so things can get a bit hairy. I did have to swallow my pride a bit as my parents were paying $22,000 just for food and drink so the venue was really their final say. Fiance and I are paying for everything else so we ,take sure we get the final say for the items we pay for. I even refused money from my future Mother-In-Law for flowers because there was no way her and I were going to Gert along and agree. She tried to get me into a teal pleated pantsuit from the 80’s for an interview once so I was not letting her near the flowers. So as a way to protect our vision, we are paying for certain things ourself. 

Post # 11
8579 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I totally take my family’s thoughts into consideration but at the end of the day.. it’s all about what I want to do, and what will work for us.

My family frowned upon using plastic plates, but in the end, we’ll be using them. They are high quality plastic plates, but still plastic. There just isn’t a way for us to wash dishes if we were to purchase them, and the rental companies are too far away.

We wanted a cocktail hour to give our guests something to do during photos.. all I heard from family members was “waste of money”.. the only person who is contributing to our wedding is my mother, and it’s a trivial about [$300], to me it’s not a “waste”.

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