Oh mother

posted 4 months ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

These all sound like things my fiance’s mom would do.  I love her to death, but she is so jealous.  We make her feel left out without ever meaning to. 

The thing I keep trying to remember is that there is no way to please every single person at my wedding.  I want to try to please all of the immediate family members, but even they aren’t going to be happy 100 percent of the time.  

I’m sorry that you are going through this.  It sounds like you are doing your best to make sure she feels appreciated and she’s still finding ways to not feel appreciated.  I know it’s easier said than done, but I’d just let her keep to her antics and ignore them as much as possible and plan on taking lots of special pictures with her and doing things the day of to make her feel good.  

Post # 3
Member
2016 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

What weird behaviour for a grown woman! lol

Sorry – I know this must be super frustrating… but honestly, I think at this point the best thing you can do is just laugh about it and let it happen.

Post # 4
Member
1707 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

My mom does this shit. She texted me last night at almost 10 o clock knowing full well I work all day, get up at the crack of dawn, go to school, and care for our home (most women do!) to start a convo. I replied, ‘He’s doing well. I’m going to bed. Sorry, night love you’. She just said, ‘night’. 

That super irritates me. Like, do you wnat me to just drop everything for -you- to make -you- feel better? Obviously I don’t voice my concerns to her because that would just make things worse but sometimes I want to!

Post # 6
Member
742 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Sounds very similar to my mom lol. Sorry, this is annoying.

Post # 8
Member
1707 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

jazzybee83 :  no kidding Im like it must be nice to walk dogs twice a week and stay home all day but I have a f*cking job lady! LOL 

Post # 11
Member
9740 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

out of curiosity, growing up did she shirk her mothering role in favor of trying to be your BFF?  

It just really sounds like she’s upset she isn’t the same as your bridesmaid, and strange she doesn’t see the value in being the MOB.

Post # 13
Member
9740 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

 jazzybee83 :  Have you always felt like your job is to protect your mothers emotions, even if you think they’re over the top?

Do you find you often put your own wants and needs aside in order to satisfy hers?

Do you find it very difficult to establish/maintain boundaries with her? 

Sorry, you don’t have to answer any of these to me.  I’m just a nosey nancy.  For the most part nothing you’ve described is particularly insane, aside from the fact she clearly is jealous of your bridesmaids and wishes she was one of those rather than MOB.  I’m just curious if this is part of a deeper pattern.

Post # 14
Member
1052 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

This would bother me too.  It’s kinda weird behavior for a mature woman.

My mother was SHOCKED when I said that my dad was walking me down the aisle. Literally, SHOCKED. Because she thought she should too. And they’re married, so it isn’t like a resentment toward the ex thing. 

Post # 15
Member
2674 posts
Sugar bee

jazzybee83 :  I would hide the one she bought and give her this onewink:

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