(Closed) Oh no! Not Bridezilla!!!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I probably would have handed her the book, highlighted, DURING the planning process. I just have never understood why some brides thing that their wedding party is free labor until after the wedding is over. As a bride, you should choose your wedding party according to who has been supportive of you during your life and relationship, not who you think can do the most work. This bride must have been some piece of work if even her now HUSBAND had second thoughts about marrying her. It seems like she not only insulted her BMs, but she also insulted him and his parents during the planning process.

I can understand the best friend’s reaction…not the timing since the wedding was already over. Like I said…I would have mutinied LONG before the wedding.

Post # 4
Member
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I think thats really funny b/c for someone to actully do that this girl must have been one crazy bride!

Post # 5
Member
5889 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

hahahha i love this.

Post # 6
Member
3148 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think its upsetting to recieve it the NEXT day…it would have been better during the process as other brides have mentioned here.

But ihave to agree with mishelleez…WHAT DID SHE DO!!! yikes!

 

and PS…poor hubby for being stuck in the middle like this….I think if i were him I would keep it quiet.

Post # 7
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

It seems like she deserved that present, and maybe her friend was scared to say someting during the planning, and figured an annonymous gift like that was the best way to give her a little reminder of her attitude. Some girls go crazy over their wedding, hence the reason they have a reality show called bridezilla’s!

Post # 8
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2010

You should not keep it from your wife if you know who sent the book. Can you imagine what will happen if eventually she finds out that you knew all along and didnt tell her? Just tell her that during the process she really was not acting right and maybe that why her bridesmaid sent it o her. You should feel insulted too because it said for your next marriage so their is no respect for your current marriage..Tell her…

Post # 9
Member
384 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I believe that there are some brides who go above and beyond the b word and maybe this woman did deserve it. However if the person was indeed a real best friend, she would have spoken up about her friends behavior. And its a double negative that her husband knows and is not telling her. Let the girls work it out but come clean. Because that would be one hell of a mess if she later finds out he knew, which Im sure she will.

The only thing I can do  about any bridezilla issues is to make sure I dont become one. I dont see that happening because I understand that although at the moment my life might revolve around my wedding, no on elses should. And if I were to get out of hand or ask to much I would hope my Bridesmaid or Best Man & Maid/Matron of Honor would let me know.

Post # 10
Member
6247 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

I wonder if she was on the show…

Post # 11
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

and the sore thumb………

When I read this I totally wasn’t thinking about the “bridezilla” behaviours….but about how stressed this poor girl must have been before her wedding. Although, I am not advocating for being disrespectful to those around you, We don’t know her situation…..nor how she handles stress….How many other things was this poor girl juggling? trying to do herself? trying to keep it together?

Instead of judging a person, I try to ask myself, what might have been going on for this woman in the first place…Honestly, there aren’t too many people who totally wear devil horns all day, every day…or people out there who really try to be miserable…. Usually there is something that triggers that behaviour…and being a bride myself, and knowing the stress that comes along with the day…I understand! Sometimes things get a little hectic for me, and it the frustration, stress simmers inside of me, until one day it blows…

Anyway, just my thought     

Post # 12
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@Ms. Judder: you sound like a nicer person than i am 🙂 I think I DO try to empathize with people and figure out why they’re acting badly if they are… but I also think that stress is no excuse for poor behavior. And while we’re at it, neither is “drunk.” hate hate hate when people say “i can’t be held responsible, i was drunk!” F that. 

Someone probably should’ve confronted her before the wedding but a lot of people are just non-confrontational. I hope the book is a catalyst for her to really examine her behavior and make amends. And I think her husband should zip it. 

Post # 13
Member
35 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I totally agree….with the drunk as an excuse! TOTALLY….

Although, I don’t agree that with “stress is no excuse for poor behaviour”. I don’t think that people try to use it as an excuse….well maybe some do….but I just don’t think that people voluntarily act like the way they do when they are stressed..I  consider myself a very thoughtful  inclusive person, but sometimes I get so overwhelmed with the everyday going ons with life, that it surfaces. I don’t think to myself “wow there is alot going on right now in my life..hmmm I think I going to be a bee with an itch today”…And I really don’t know too many people who would do that.

Personally speaking, I think we all have our own stories…our own troubles….our own challenges….and we don’t always wear this on our sleeves for others to see…but that doesn’t mean that we don’t have them nonetheless….Can you seriously say, that after you talk to someone and hear their stories…you can’t sympathsize with them….serioulsy…How many people have you said..”Oh I hate that girl without knowing here..but then maybe a few months down the road get to know her and feel so differently…Really if you think about it, when you really get to know a person and their stories..you rarely end up hating them…

 I think we just need to learn how to walk in others shoes, before we are so quick to judge.

Post # 14
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

lmao… if she was THAT bad and so bad her HUSBAND says she was a bridezilla, I’d be the one to hand her the book BEFORE the wedding, tell her what she’s acting like, and where she could stick her attitude, behavior, AND the book!!!  not to mention the wedding.  but then, I’ve been dealt horrible behavior from my own family, I’m not taking it from anyone else.  (My Fiance and I have had lots of discussions about things like that… and it’s sometimes involved his son from a previous marriage, soooo, yeah.)

I’d say if the friend sent it to her after the fact, it’s not so much a “you’re heading for divorce (which is possible)” but a “learn some manners” type attitude. 

As for what I think the husband should do?  Simple: stand up to his wife and tell her what she was acting like and that her behavior was WRONG.  (WHY wasn’t he doing that prior to the wedding is MY question!!!)

all-in-all… I think that’s pretty damned funny!!!

Post # 15
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

um…i’m not paying for any rehearsal dinner…lol…but i don’t think i’m a bridezilla either. if I was, I’d want to be told even though i’d probably get upset.

Post # 16
Member
5657 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

I think if her friend was really her friend and her husband has a backbone, they should have discussed her bridezilla attitude with her while the wedding planning was going on instead of passively aggressively sending a horrible “gift” like that after the fact. Even if the bride was a complete brat, it’s just as immature to do something like that rather than addressing the problem like grownups.

I think everyone in this situation is messed up.

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