(Closed) Ok, so I’m engaged – what next? What was the first thing you did when planning?

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
5786 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

Well the very first thing we had was a surprise engagement party thrown by my mom but you can’t really plan that yourself πŸ˜‰ We went venue hunting immediately and without a budget and I really wish we hadn’t. We got severe sticker shock and it was super stressful. I wish we had just enjoyed it for a month or two, figured out a budget and then gone venue shopping.

Post # 4
11217 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Firstly congratulations. The first thing I did was to buy a Bridal Magazine just to get inspiration. The one thing I wish I did was to try on dresses sooner but as my friend was getting married that year I didn’t want to take the limelight off her. Try on lots of different dresses and if you try on one shape and it doesn’t suit you go elsewhere and try on that same shape again.

Post # 5
1120 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010


We first decided on a date and location (as in region, not venue).

I used the Knot checklist – it generates deadlines according to your wedding date, it was very useful, as well as other online tools that they have.

Post # 6
5106 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

The very first thing we did was decide on a date! Then I was calling venues and booking the church. Then I was the google image master for inspiration photos!

Post # 7
1761 posts
Buzzing bee

First, we set a date and a budget. Then we began researching venues online. Within a month we had selected and booked the venue, made a tentative guest list (which we refined by the third month), hired a partial planner, and decided on theme and colors. We are kind of crazy on top of things though πŸ™‚

We got engaged at the beginning of November and just booked our last vendor last week. However, we basically took a couple months off in the midst of it for Christmas/New Years, and I also had an overwhelming work/freelance schedule for several weeks in Jan/Feb.

I think if you work hard you can certainly get most of the big stuff out of the way in time to enjoy summer!

Post # 8
4109 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011


The first thing we did was set a date & budget, then had an engagement party. After that, the next important thing for me was locking in the venue w/ a deposit, since everything else planning-wise revolves around that decision (for me anyways).

Post # 9
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

We set an approximate date, bought a ring & broke the news to everyone. πŸ™‚

Post # 10
293 posts
Helper bee

The first thing I did was research venues and begin visiting them. We didn’t set our date until after we had decided on a venue so that we would have more flexibility. The venue search took a while so I was also looking for my dress at the same time!

Post # 11
798 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Congratulations πŸ™‚

I went and bought a bridal magazine πŸ™‚

Sit down with your new Fiance, and talk about guest-list numbers, when you look at venues you’ll need to have an idea as to approximately how many are coming.

If you want to relax this summer…i’d suggest booking a venue. Then you’ll have the when and where figured out….

Post # 12
3520 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

First thing we did was pick a date and work on guest lists to determine a budget.  The fun part is buying some bridal magazies and finding your inspiration pieces.  I keep a piece of patterned scrapbook paper with my colors in my purse. 

Post # 13
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I agree with your FH that it’s better to get the big stuff done. We got engaged December 19, 2010 and for the first week had set the date for November 2012. Then we realized that regardless of when the wedding was, I was going to start planning right away so we moved it to November 2011 because I didn’t want to be done planning and just sitting and waiting for this day for a year and a half! We decided how fancy the wedding would be (not really, I always knew and said I wanted a black-tie optional wedding) so the first thing my mom and I did was go pick my dress! We thought that would really get is into wedding mode and it did! Next was venue (same location for cer. and rec. and catering & alcohol included), photographer, Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses and Groomsmen tuxes, invitation designs, DJ (we already knew exactly who we would use), and florist/decorator, officiant, and harpist. All of those big decisions were made within four weeks of us getting engaged! (I was leaving for my last semester of school in Jan. and wanted all of the big stuff decided on by the time I left!). So now it’s smooth sailing from here, just details like meeting with the florist for the sample, choosing the music with the harpist, etc. I highly recommend doing as much as you can as early as you can. It’s just more energy you can put towards being excited about your wedding as it gets closer instead of having to make big huge decisions! πŸ™‚

Post # 14
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We sort of did a few things concurrently. We had to decide where we wanted to get married (region, not venue) because we live in a different part of the country from our families.

Then we found out how much money our parents could contribute.

Then we decided how many people we wanted to be there.

And then we looked at a variety of venues that met our style (unique, not a hotel ballroom) and that fit within our budget (# of people / available budget) AND could accommodate everyone we wanted. It was REALLY hard.

So then we actually CHANGED regions because venues in NYC were just eating too much of our budget and we couldn’t afford it. Went from East Coast to West Coast. And then did the same venue hunting there.

Once we knew where we wanted to get married, we asked for available dates in the time of year we wanted (July). We weren’t hung up about it being on a specific date, so we were more flexible with venues.

But if you’re more set on a date, then that will influence where you get married, because a great venue might not be available.

Sometimes if you have a certain theme you want, like a rustic wedding or a formal wedding, that will determine your venue choices too, but not always. But if you have something in mind, you should start thinking about that now.

That’s sort of the order we did things. Once we had a venue and a date, we did everything else.

I definitely bought several bridal magazines and read wedding blogs to see what kinds of venues we should consider (restaurants, barns, parks, etc.). But I didn’t really consider them for the nit-gritty details until later.

Post # 15
1486 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Congrats! First decide where (like city) and get an idea of your guest count and then pick a venue!! I don’t think a little over a year out if too far away to book a venue… esp for a summer wedding!

Post # 16
726 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I think I did it backward but I bought my dress πŸ™‚ couldnt help myself!

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