(Closed) OMG Bees….IT’S OVER

posted 10 years ago in Waiting
Post # 19
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Big hugs, DreamingBee!  I know it is hard right now, but I think this is a good thing for you!  Live the life you want and find someone who will love you but will be able to provide you with and give you all the things you need out of life!  Wishing you the best – and good luck on your interview!  

Post # 20
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

When I saw the title, I was really hoping it’d be a “The waiting is over, I’m engaged” post. I so sorry to hear this ๐Ÿ™

I have to say that I am amazed by how calm you remained in the situation. You seem like a really strong person and I am sure you will get through this… and find an amazing guy who wants what you want ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 21
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

First of all… I’m sorry this happened to you! I’m so proud of you for showing him the door. I definitely think that was the best thing you could have done. It may have shocked him too. I can’t say much that the other bees haven’t said, but high five for maintaining your strength. He will either come around or he won’t. He said what he needed to say and you showed a lot of class by not grabbing him by the shirt and collapsing at his feet asking him a million questions. I think this will give you both a few moments of clarity. He’ll have a lot of alone time to think about what exactly it is that he wants, and you’ve got a lot going on with your career. It doesn’t hurt that you’re being flown around the country to keep your mind off of it. Wink The positive aspect of this is that you know what you want and where you want your life to head. You have a lot of drive and you’ve kept everything in perspective. Through all your posts, the thing you keep constant is the fact that you have maintained your independence. Sometimes that’s the most attractive thing to a man. Keep your head up and you’re going to end up very happy, whether it’s with him or another man that will treat you exactly how you deserve to be treated. Definitely keep us updated on your interview process because I’m sooo curious to hear about it! I hope you stick around WB because I always look forward to your posts!

Post # 22
Member
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

It sounds like you did the right thing.  I went through something similar with my ex.  The amazing thing is, a little later, I met someone who had all the things my ex didn’t.  He ended up beeing an a&%#&**%, but it taught me how much I needed what my ex didn’t have.  Fastforward a few years later, and I am married to a wonderful guy who is not at all like anyone I have dated, but we have such different strengths that it works out really well.  I grow more in this relationship than I have in any other, and he REALLY WANTED to marry me.  In fact, he said later he would have proposed sooner except didn’t think I would say yes.  That’s what you want.  I see so many people who stay in relationships for years and years, wanting to get married to a guy who doesn’t, and that is awful.  Often, the hard thing short-term is the best thing long-term.  Hugs!

Post # 23
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee

You totally did the right thing and the brave thing.  Good for you for showing him the door.  We all deserve someone that wants to be with us as much as we do with them.  As you may recall I am single now too and the hardest part was the first week.  Breathe, relax and do some nice things for yourself and more than anything….don’t call that man!

Post # 24
Member
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

DB, I admire your courage! You’re definantly a strong, indepenant woman! Wish I could have done the same with my last relationship. Good luck on your interview. I’m sure you will rock it!Cool

Post # 25
Member
2870 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

you so deserve to be wanted, anything less than that is simply not acceptable,

You are so brave and I am so proud of you for having the courage to love yourself more than the idea of a future with this guy.

In the end you will be stronger for this and he may see this strong independent side and come crawling back, and if he doesn’t you have this newfound courage and outlook on life… its all about YOU baby, and making YOU happy.  If someone isnt making you feel anything short of a pricess then they get the boot. 

Best of luck on your interview! 

Post # 26
Member
39 posts
Newbee

You are so strong, and I’m really proud of you for that!  You absolutely did the right thing.  He is obviously not the right person for you, and I know you will find the one in time.  Good luck!

Post # 27
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Seriously, I think you did the right thing. You deserve to be with someone who wants you every bit as much as you want him. Not with someone who might maybe someday want you the same way you want him. It’s hard, and it’s probably going to get harder before it gets easier. But you are going to be ok, I just know it.

Post # 29
Member
1774 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

One book that might help is He’s Just not that into You.  It’s awesome!  Also, the author has It’s called a breakup because it’s broken.  Very helpful.

Post # 30
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee

Another thing I would like to add.  I’m so glad you chose yourself over him.  You are absolutely correct in saying more good times doesn’t make a difference.  When a man is ready….he is ready!

If he tries to come back I would not accept anything less than a ring.  He has already told you he is confused.  By letting him leave you showed him that you are serious and not to be taken lightly. 

Breakups are not easy but it doesn’t feel so bad when you stuck up for yourself and how you feel!

Post # 31
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@guitargirl: I LOVE “It’s called  A Breakup Because It’s Broken”!! It got me through my AWFUl breakup five years ago.  It’s a great read!!

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