(Closed) OMG Bees….IT’S OVER

posted 10 years ago in Waiting
Post # 47
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I am so sorry you are going through this at such a stressful time πŸ™ Remember to lean on your friends and yourself. You sound like a strong, independent person so you can overcome this!  My fiance and I went through a breakup together and I will never forget what that conversation felt like. I remember feeling like I would never get over it and then one day I did. I did keep a journal, it helped me get my thoughts out of my head (but this blog is probably good too!). Eventually, we got back together, more mature, and learned a lot from it. I don’t know where the two of you will end up, but it will eventually become more clear to both of you what is best.

Good luck with your interview!! Wishing you the best!  

Post # 48
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Glad I could help. I honestly almost didn’t write it, because he sounds like a great guy and I didn’t want to look as if I’m bashing him or something… But I feel that it’s really sad to let go of something so good because you can’t overcome your fears.. I hope he comes to his senses, but if he doesn’t, I’m positive you’ll find someone who won’t be afraid to be with you (how frightening can that be, haha).

I think we all have one story like this, at least I do, and I can empathise with you.

Post # 49
Member
841 posts
Busy bee

**hugs**. Be strong, hun. You will get through this. I hope everything works out for you (both). πŸ™‚

Post # 50
Member
293 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@DreamingBee: Oh, honey, PM me your address and I’ll send you my copy! (Seriously, I will…if you want it.)

I have to say, it’s been awesome reading all these responses.  I think we all have one story like this in our history, it seems.  The important thing is that you are true to yourself.  And like a PP mentioned, you did it with grace and dignity.

I was just thinking, have you ever done “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron?  I did it after that bad breakup 5 years ago, and it was super helpful. 

(I can send you that book too!)

Post # 51
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I am so sorry! *hugs*

You absolutely did the right thing.  I was with my ex for 6 1/2 years and I was an absolute mess when we broke up but it was the right thing.  It is not going to be easy at first, but it really does get better with time.  My ex used to go back and forth about wanting to get married, but I played that game with him for so long and I got to the point where I couldn’t do it anymore.  As heartbroken as I was, I felt a little relief at the same time because I struggled so much with the waiting and waiting!

When we broke up I really did not think that I would ever love anyone as much as I loved by ex BF, but then I met Fiance.  Not right away…I met him about 2 years later which was perfect, but we do have an amazing relationship.  My ex BF and I are still friendly and it is very easy for me to now see that we were not right for each other.

Hang in there, I know everything will work out for you, too!

Post # 53
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Oh, man. I am so sorry to hear that…=/ Stay strong. Sending you Internet hugs…and here’s a Lolcat, too. Breakups suck. Remember that you have yourself, your strength, and of course your girls. (And the Bee–we’re all here for you!)

Post # 54
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m curious… has he tried to call you or talk about it since you showed him the door?

Post # 56
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I’m so sorry you’re going through this but you really seem to have a good perspective about the situation.

Was your ex’s work partner’s GF all wasted when she invited you to the concert? If not, are you planning on going? And do you think you’re going to continue your friendship with her? It seems like she wants to continue the friendship. And it’s not like she has to choose side (imo) since your break up doesn’t seem to be super messy or anything.

Post # 58
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

View original reply
@DreamingBee: you’re such a sweet girl, I’ve read your comments many times in other bees’ posts and you always have nice positive words; just wanted to tell you obvious things that sometimes we forget when something like this happens:

– time really does do wonders, and maybe you’ll need a very long time to get over him, but you WILL, just keep thinking that day after day, it’s one less day of pain and suffering

– you told the guy you love him enough to marry him and be by his side forever, that’s the most beautiful thing a person can say to another, so you didn’t do anything wrong at all! don’t keep analyzing the things that you did and said, he knows you love him deeply and want to be with him forever, he knows you too and will understand and justify your reaction and your specific words, foget about little details that you did or didn’t do… he has the information!

– the ball is in his side and there’s NOTHING you can’t do… this will relax you, because you don’t have to make any decision or do anything except focus in healing

Keep being strong! This WILL PASS!

Post # 60
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Congratulations on making it through DAY 1! πŸ™‚ I think you are through and done with the worst day of a breakup. Stay strong and we’re here for you!

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