Post # 1
- Wedding: April 2017 - City, State
I’ve been planning the wedding (no contracts signed or money paid, just contacting various vendors and have a few venue visits coming up) as normal, but I can’t seem to dismiss the idea of eloping. There isn’t any family drama or financial issues at play, I just can’t decide if I want the big (relatively speaking as we’re aiming for 70-85 people) wedding or not.
I’ve tried to shake the idea of eloping because I think I might regret not having a wedding, but as I make plans for it, I’ve continued to seriously consider eloping, and have recently contacted venues that cater to that.
For those that were on the fence, how did you end up deciding? What made one option more appealing than the other? Was there any fallout over your choice or any regrets?
I asked my Fiance about it and he said, “as long as we’re married at the end of the day, I’m fine with either.”
I’d thought about doing a small wedding of maybe 15-20 people (all immediate family), but I don’t know if it’d be asking too much for people to fly in for what would basically be a 10-15 minute ceremony and a dinner party.
Post # 2
Watching. I’m currently on the fence as well.
Post # 3
we were planning the big huge wedding and in the end had a very intimate surprise wedding. we decided to do it that way as everytime we thought of eloping we were upset that his parents and our close friends wouldnt be there. I was worried that I would regret not having the big party but I am so ridiculously happy that we did it the way we did! We’re MARRIED!!! and in the end thats what was most important to us.
Post # 4
Honestly a small wedding with like 25 people will still require A LOT of planning…I wanted to just elope and then throw a dinner party type shindig to celebrate after. My fiancé was totally against it….but guess who planed the whole wedding?? lol MEeeee.
If you are on the same page then elope ! Get a good photographer and then celebrate with family + friends.
Post # 5
We had some family drama, but for us the biggest appeal was what we would get for our money. We’re eloping to Paris (from the U.S.) and traveling around Europe for a little over two weeks – for the same amount of money as hosting an 80-person typical wedding in our town. The most important things to me/us were photography, dress, and being married, and we didn’t need anything from a traditional wedding to do that.
Post # 6
I’ve decided on elopement. None of the stress of planning, saving thousands of dollars, and the idea that it will just be the two of us = easy decision for me. But we are older (58 and 45), he’s been married before, and none of our parents are alive, so that makes it easier, I think.
Post # 7
- Wedding: September 2016 - Little Chapel of Flowers
I say elope, and have a small party to celebrate with close family and friends when you get back! I mean for what a wedding costs, you can have an awesome elopement/honeymoon. But I am biased because that is what I am doing.
Post # 8
Elope! I wish I did. And I’d love to be able to take back my decision not to every day. I’ve got nonstop family drama thou.
Post # 9
Here’s my experience.
DH and I got engaged Feb 2015 after 4.5years together. We started planning a wedding for June 2016. I personally never wanted the big hullabaloo of a traditional wedding, but DH wanted the “party” aspect of it.
We could have afforded the wedding we were planning, but WHY spend all the money if we (Mostly “i”) weren’t totally into it. I didn’t want to spend our savings on something that was for “everyone else”.
So around June 2015 we scrapped all our original plans for the traditional wedding and I went to work on something new.
We already had our bands purchased so we didn’t have to think about that, but I did want a long white dress. Of course!
We had our ceremony on a Friday afternoon in a lovely little gazebo outside of our courthouse. I had a wedding dress, a bouquet, and the greatest man in front of me promising me forever. 🙂 we only had around 15 people watch us get married (immediate family, close friends)
Saturday we had an I Do BBQ in our backyard with about 50 people. I rented tables/chairs/table cloths. The whole thing cost us around $5000 and we are just as married as anyone else. 7 months later I couldn’t have imagined doing it any other way. We still have people telling us it was the most fun they ever had at a wedding type event.
So go with your heart. Don’t let anyone tell you your wedding has to be a certain way
Post # 10
go with your heart…. but my vote is elope unless a traditional wedding is REALLY important to you. If you’re on the fence… elope.
Post # 11
We’re planning to elope… well, actually a private civil ceremony at the County Clerk’s office but we’re having a casual celebration the following weekend with 50 guests (we’re planning to have the civil ceremony on a Thursday).
We decided to do this because our priorities are our condo (which we recently bought) and travel (we have 2 trips planned this year).
I think your friends and family will understand in whatever you choose. 🙂
Post # 12
There’s something romantic about two people in love just running away and doing what makes THEM happy. I vote for the elopement. I’m sure that your family and friends will still be more than happy for you.
Post # 13
reverse point of view by gender, otherwise same here. watching 🙂
Post # 14
I might have a similar outcome to your lovealways:
Post # 15
- Wedding: April 2017 - City, State
Oh wow! I honestly didn’t expect too many responses in favor of elopements. You all raise some great points, and seem really happy with your choices (or would have liked to elope if you didn’t ended up going that direction in the end). Lately I’ve been feeling like I’ve had to convince myself I want a wedding because, as silly as it sounds, part of me doesn’t want to miss out on the “wedding experience”, whatever that is.
I think, if we don’t go full on elopement (which I’m really considering now) we’ll cut 75% of the guest list and just have a small wedding for immediate family only. The more I plan, the more I feel like a “big” wedding just may not be the right fit. In some ways it makes me happy to be sorting this out before things have been bought and paid for, but it also makes me a little sad and I’m not really sure why.