Post # 1
Nothing seems to be going as planned—I expected as such but I have been pushed to my limits! First it took 3 months to choose a date. If the church was available the venue wasn’t and vise versa. Then the money issues affected so many decisions. Then the DJ wasn’t available so we changed the date to a Sunday. Well the caterer can’t do the Sunday. Then I get a surprise in the rental contract of an additional $1000 “refundable deposit”. Is this really refundable?! Bc if not then I need another venue. But now time has decreased our chances of finding anything at all. Ugh!!! Super stressed bride with an overbearing mother and a fiance that refuses to put his input. So what would you do???
Post # 3
Deep breath! Relax!
If the contract says it’s a refundable deposit, then it’s refundable! You just need to ask how long it takes to get the money back. Mine has the same thing, and they said they’d drop it in the mail 1-2 weeks after the wedding once they ensure there was no damage. Fortunately, you’ve got plenty of time if you need to find anything new! Don’t stress out just yet!
Post # 4
Fortunately, you still have quite a bit of time (9 months!) We had a hard time deciding on a date at first too, and when we decided on one, everyone close to us that we told complained because it was labor day weekend, so we ended up changing it. We set our date first, then looked for our venue. Since my fiance and I are paying for nearly everything ourselves, it was a little tough to find a venue that was affordable enough for us without being super tacky. There are MANY photographers, dj’s, etc. out there, and I’m sure that if you keep looking you will find one that can work on the day of your wedding without sacrificing your venue or date. We set the date and worked around that-finding a venue that was available that day (we’re getting married at a remodeled classy looking barn), photographers that were available that day (not our first choice, but even better than our first choice!!!) etc. We are 47 days out and I JUST switched florists to save money.
The other piece of advice I would offer to you is to make sure you order your bridesmaid dresses and your dress well in advance to your wedding. My bridesmaids paid for their dresses in March, and the dresses were supposed to be ordered when they were paid for, but the owner of the store used the money to pay her bills since she is having cash-flow problems and JUST ordered the dresses 2 weeks ago. We don’t even know if they’ll arrive in time for the wedding!
I feel your pain. There are several days when I want to call the whole thing off, get my money back, and run away to get married. But I know that’s not what I truly want, that’s just me being dramatic and annoyed!! 🙂
Things will fall in place. Just keep hacking away at your plans, and don’t be afraid to get aggressive when you need to!!! (verbally, not physically) 😉
Post # 5
Thank you ladies for the encouraging words, it’s just such a stressful thing planning a wedding. I think I do just need to take a deep breath and think it out. Woooo
Post # 6
@STBMrsCJM: I had a lot of back of forth in the begining about my dates as I am having a Destination Wedding and there was one hair dresser I wanted to use and when they were available the venue wasnt, so lots of back and forth and all done by email. I ended up swtiching dates about 5 times. I then also had to change the date again after I had sent out STD as had a friend who just found out she was graduating on that same day and another was pregnant. Wedding planning is stressful, so I guess if you expect things to take a while, and be frustrating, it might not feel so bad. Sorry you have an overbearing mother to deal with, maybe just stop givign her info and not ask her opnion about things and see if that gives you more space. Many FI’s arent really that involved from what I have seen on Wedding bee. Mine only helps a little, but I try to bring him summarys once I have done all the hard yards searching down options, ie excel sheets etc and photos and he gives me about 15 minutes help lol before he loses interest.
Post # 7
I’m having crazy amounts of wedding stress too. Not the same kind of problems as you, but problems none the less. Just hang in there! Keep breathing! If you really think eloping sounds a lot better than a wedding, now would be the time to decide! You’ll get through this <3