(Closed) One bridesmaid (out of seven) wants straps

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 49
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I was a Maid/Matron of Honor and said I loved the Bridesmaid or Best Man dress because I didn’t want to be difficult. But I loathe sweetheart cuts on me. The resounding memory from my best friends wedding is how uncomfortable and disgusting I felt all day in that dress. I’d let her wear the straps. Not a soul will care… Including you on the day, I’m sure. 

Edit: sorry didn’t see all the messages before I responded.. Not trying to make you feel bad, just adding my experience! I’m sure you aren’t a bad friend! 

Post # 51
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I bought the shawls from a street vendor in NYC for $5 each. 

I gave then to the girls during our rehersal dinner as part of the bridesmaids gifts. Not only did they look pretty the shawls kept them warm.

 

Post # 52
Member
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I promise you nobody is going to look at the pictures and go like “how awful, only one of them is wearing straps and she’s not even MOH!”

Post # 53
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I know you said the dresses have been ordered/received… but honestly what do you plan on doing with the bridesmaid/bridal party picture? I have never seen one hanging in someone’s house and would not put it in my house either. I say just let her get straps or give them shawls for pictures because honestly… there will be a few pix in your album and a few on facebook and honestly no one will think about it again! When your wedding is over i’m sure you won’t think twice about it or mind. It seems like a big deal now because you have everything wedding on your mind.

 

At first I wanted my BMs to have matching shoes (cocktail length dress) and then I realized… who cares?! I just had them match the same color.

Post # 54
Member
2742 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Disney

I seriously hate the strapless trend.I really hope it dies a well deserved death very soon it looks aweful in photos like poof sleaves from the 80s. I also hate when the bride insists that her bridesmaids go around showing more skin than is appropriate for a church. Strapless is NOT FLATTERING on a lot of bodies. It makes people look like sausages in casings. This maybe your day but that doesn’t mean you have to make others miserable.

I told my women no strapless dresses and they actually about had a party. I refuse to make them wear dresses that I find inappropriate, and that are uncomfortable. I’ve spent many many hours trying to find an appropriate gown that is comfortable, beautiful, and will fit very different body types. In the end if the two I’m considering dont work they’ll wear different dresses in the same color. What matters is they are comfortable, and have dresses that they look good on them not that they match my dress or what my dream is.

Post # 56
Member
2555 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@dewingedpixie:  well, you talk about appropiate but this doesn’t seem to be a modesty issue as much as a comfort issue.

Post # 58
Member
2742 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Disney

@Ms.Sugarsnap:  Its also uncomfortable. Both of my girls agreed on that. No matter how well you have those dresses fitted they’re going to be pulling them up all night. Strapless bras also suck. They are uncomfortable. I think if your bridesmaid is honestly uncomfortable as the bride you should be a little more considerate of your friend rather than what your photos look like. I’m sorry but nobody is going to point and go OMG straps in your photos, but your friend will remember 20 years from now how uncomfortable you made her feel. If you’re more worried about a photo than her feelings and personal comfort than you’re really a horrible friend.

Post # 59
Member
1548 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would let her wear the straps. I am so much more concerned with the comfort and happiness of my BMs then what it will look like in a few picutres that are going to sit in an album that you maybe look at once a year. 

Post # 60
Member
4354 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@dewingedpixie:  And lots of people LIKE strapless on them, like myself? I find it suits my body type and most of the dresses I own (including the wedding dress I chose and wore) are strapless so that argument is moot. There are people who will dislike them and some who will like them, neither of those things really apply to the OP’s question or concerns.

Post # 61
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would just let her wear the straps. My fiance’s sister is Mormon and is having to wear a high neck dress AND a jacket when all the other girls are in one shoulders and we didn’t complain. Just let her be comfortable.

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