(Closed) One week left until wedding do I ask someone to be my bridesmaid???

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
2253 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@louloufrosty:  I personally would not liked to be asked one week before a wedding to be a bridesmaid. It’s not because I wouldn’t feel honored but because there are so many practical issues that come into play with so little notice:

  1. Do I now have more unexpected expenses such as buying the dress and shoes?
  2. I now have to tell my date I won’t keep him company while I’m doing my BM’s duties.
  3. What are my BM’s duties?
  4. Do I have to make a speech?
  5. Will I be able to even take off from work to help the bride?

If you want to thank her, I think a nice gift or card would be sufficient.

Post # 4
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

It sounds like she’s already acting as a bridesmaid with your hen night, staying with you the night before, and helping you get ready. I would hope that if you do ask her, you would just have her wear what she’s already planning on wearing to the wedding, as there’s obviously no time to find a “bridesmaid’s dress”. If you’re not asking her to do anything more at the last minute, I think it’s a really nice gesture to make. But I do think making it clear that she doesn’t have to give a speech or buy a new dress and shoes is a must.

Post # 5
Member
245 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Does your Fiance have a best man? If not, I say no. This can be really tricky. Have you tried mentioning this to her in a way? I think it is a lot of pressure, a week before. I agree with what is said above, you can ask her, but you need to make it clear, i don’t want a speech, a huge gift, and all of that, i just want you to stand by my side.

Post # 6
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I would rephrase it as “I would like you to stand with me”, and definitely allow her to wear whatever (or pay for the dress and rush fees yourself).  It’s too short of a time for any of the other duties of a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but I think asking her to stand next to you is a nice honor!

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