Post # 1
Hey everyone, I have one week left to go 🙂 yay! I decided early on that I wasn’t going to have any bridesmaids as you here all the drama stories. Anyway fast forward to now I’m seriously considering asking one if my best friends. One my hen night she really went to town and made a real effort. I’m so grateful. She’s staying with me on the night before and helping me get ready so she’s already gunna be there. What do you all think? Any help appreciated xxx
Post # 3
@louloufrosty: I personally would not liked to be asked one week before a wedding to be a bridesmaid. It’s not because I wouldn’t feel honored but because there are so many practical issues that come into play with so little notice:
- Do I now have more unexpected expenses such as buying the dress and shoes?
- I now have to tell my date I won’t keep him company while I’m doing my BM’s duties.
- What are my BM’s duties?
- Do I have to make a speech?
- Will I be able to even take off from work to help the bride?
If you want to thank her, I think a nice gift or card would be sufficient.
Post # 4
It sounds like she’s already acting as a bridesmaid with your hen night, staying with you the night before, and helping you get ready. I would hope that if you do ask her, you would just have her wear what she’s already planning on wearing to the wedding, as there’s obviously no time to find a “bridesmaid’s dress”. If you’re not asking her to do anything more at the last minute, I think it’s a really nice gesture to make. But I do think making it clear that she doesn’t have to give a speech or buy a new dress and shoes is a must.
Post # 5
Does your Fiance have a best man? If not, I say no. This can be really tricky. Have you tried mentioning this to her in a way? I think it is a lot of pressure, a week before. I agree with what is said above, you can ask her, but you need to make it clear, i don’t want a speech, a huge gift, and all of that, i just want you to stand by my side.
Post # 6
I would rephrase it as “I would like you to stand with me”, and definitely allow her to wear whatever (or pay for the dress and rush fees yourself). It’s too short of a time for any of the other duties of a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but I think asking her to stand next to you is a nice honor!
Post # 7
Thanks ladies, I have asked her and she said yes straight away! I explained that we would buy the flowers and that she could wear the dress she already has. She has said that she would like a “proper” bridesmaid dress so I have offered to pay for it and she said she will give me the money after payday. I don’t want to pressure anyone but it seams daft that she has been througslalom with me and is going to be there on the day. She may aswel have a bunch of flowers and some if the limelight 🙂 x