(Closed) Only 3 RVSPs & my wedding is in August, should I be worried?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: If you were invited to an out-of-state wedding in August, would you know if you were going by now?
    Yes, I would have decided either way if I would be attending by this time. : (20 votes)
    14 %
    No, I would still be considering it and looking at travel options. : (104 votes)
    71 %
    If I were going to attend I'd have my flight booked by now. : (10 votes)
    7 %
    If I were not going to attend I'd have sent back a decline by now. : (12 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    823 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @BrieBrieGorGor:  I wouldn’t be worried yet, OP. it’s still only May 🙂 even if some of your friends are traveling from out of state, it’s still pretty far out to make a commitment either way. When is the due date for RSVPs? Until the due date has passed, you really can’t worry about it. 

    Post # 4
    8860 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @BrieBrieGorGor:  some people like to wait to the last minute to respond.  typically a 3 week response time is given.  you gave 6 months, responses aren’t due until july.  wait until july to start going crazy then you can start to call people and find out if they are coming.  they propably looked at the invitation, said they’ll look at it later and then forgot about sending the response.

    Post # 5
    227 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Honestly, I don’t tend to make plans very far ahead. Not concretely. Just in my nature.  I would have completely forgotten about your invite already, since you sent it so long ago and I didn’t need to handle it then. This is not saying that I forgot about your wedding, it just wouldn’t be in the front of my mind. I would not be at all offended if one of my close friends called me and was like, “hey! are you coming to my wedding?” I would tell them the truth, that either I was unsure still, or yes, I am planning on it, just haven’t returned the rsvp yet. 

    And know, that things can change quickly in peoples lives. The further they answer that they are coming, the more likely things are to change. Sometimes things are out of our control, you know?

    Post # 6
    1218 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Personally, I would have everything booked and a RSVP sent because Fiance and I are broke, so we would be booking flights as early as possible to save money. However, I would wait until July to start chasing them up. People might be still finalising plans with work and things like that.


    Post # 11
    1475 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    No, I wouldn’t be worred yet. My wedding is July 27 and we aren’t even sending out invitations until the end of May. Invitations are usually sent out 6-8 weeks before the event and given a 3-4 week response period.

    Post # 12
    838 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2008

    You asked them to RSVP by July. It’s only May. I wouldn’t be committing to anything that’s not a business trip in May if the event isn’t until August. Anything can happen between now and then.

    Post # 13
    2715 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I wouldn’t worry.  Typically invites go out 6-8 weeks in advance.  So for an August wedding most people wouldn’t have even seen sent out their invites at this point.

    Unless I’m travelling somewhere remote or international, I don’t start looking at plane tickets or travel options until a few months out.  It’s also hard for people to know their work schedule 3+ months in advanced.

    I’d wait until your deadline passes before worrying and contacting people.  And even then I probably wouldn’t worry too much.  Since you sent the invites out so early, people may have just misplaced them or simply forgot when the RSVP deadline was.

    Post # 14
    3725 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @BrieBrieGorGor:  So why are invites being sent so early? Seems like they used to be sent much closer to the event date. Seems crazy to me but then again, I just got an invite to my cousin’s August wedding last week. Can you tell me why so early? I’m just curious.

    Post # 15
    3725 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @BrieBrieGorGor:  For the record, I made my travel plans for my cousin’s August wedding 3 weeks ago and already sent my RSVP back so while I do think it’s completely too early to start stressing over RSVPs, some of your guests might be as well-planned as me! 🙂 

    Post # 16
    1149 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013 - Ontario, Canada

    I am a super planner like you so would have RSVPd by now but most people don’t. I am in a similar situation where half of our guests are flying in to Toronto from Europe for our September wedding and only my family have booked their flights so far. A few friends have RSVPd yes but not booked anyting yet, and others have told me that they would love to come but they are looking into options and to see if it will be possible before they confirm and RSVP. I fully understand that it is a big commitment for people though, and some may want to wait to see if they can save money and afford it, so I am not expecting to know until August really.

    To put things into perspective though, my friend is getting married in July and it’s about 3 hours away and we haven’t booked our accommodation for that yet…. Basically what I am trying to say is that you will probably get lots of people letting you know at the end of June/July.

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