Oops…

posted 5 days ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I knew it was coming and I think for the most part in today’s world where couples discuss getting married and shop for rings together most people are not completely surprised. I knew the ring was in the house, and when he asked if I wanted to go to one of my very favorite places for the weekend I painted my nails. It was amazing and wonderful and magical and having a very strong hunch had no effect on it whatsover.

Honestly after being together for five years could it really be a true surprise?

Post # 4
Member
70 posts
Worker bee

I know the date of my upcoming proposal, you’ll be fine!

Congratulations, how exciting.

Post # 5
Member
6643 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

I knew he had the ring (I’d tried it on several times). I’d told him a timeline by which I’d like to be engaged (and then forgot I’d told him that, so I was a bit surprised at the time). You still don’t know exactly when he’s proposing or how and you really don’t need that much of a surprise when it’s a question of major life choices. You’ve had enough conversation to know you are both interested in marriage, right? You knew a proposal was coming, it sounds like.

Keep your nails done and then focus on other things so you aren’t torturing yourself. Be sure to come back and tell us the story!

Post # 6
Member
42 posts
Newbee

Absolutely knew it was coming.

We picked up my bridal set together and I told him I’d like him to ask by Valentine’s. I didn’t expect a grand gesture, and he simply asked me at home, which totally fits who we are as people. 

Post # 7
Member
566 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2020

Most women know it’s coming.  If it was a true surprise it probably wouldn’t be a good thing in a lot of cases.  Couples communicate and decide together.  It’s not some huge step that the man only gets to decide when the time is right.

Post # 8
Member
1427 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

This expectation that women be surprised when their men propose marriage to them is outdated and a bit absurd when you pause and consider it. 

My husband and I talked about our timeline, I knew when he picked up the ring and I was still surprised and teary-eyed when he got down on one knee. Knowing it’s coming doesn’t make it any less special. 

Post # 9
Member
4548 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

honeybee919 :  I knew it was coming because we’d discussed getting married and he told me to send him rings I liked. I was at his house when the ring was delivered so I even tried it on with his permission to find it was sent one size too small! Our proposal was more of a formality and I knew exactly when it was happening but it was still very nice and special for us.

I would however probably keep it under your hat from your partner that you know some facts simply so that way he gets to be excited about ‘surprising’ you. I’d save it as a secret humorous fact to tell him years down the road when you are happily married and will both be able to find the humour in it. The ring, the proposal, the wedding may seem so important at this time but as the years go by trust me when I say so much more will have happened in your life and relationship that as nice as it all was/is, it will be something you remember fondly but it won’t be as big and important as it may seem now.

Congrats on your upcoming semi surprise proposal! ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 10
Member
240 posts
Helper bee

He hasn’t proposed yet and I won’t go into super detail, but I know he pays the ring off this month because I can see the ring online ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„ it’s added a little bit of fun to it I guess.  He also will have to get the ring appraised (it’s a vintage ring) during our warranty time and I told him to be communicative with me during it if he needed input.

that being said, he wants to do a surprise proposal and so even though I know from March-May (possibly into the summer but he gets excited and can’t always hold out on surprises) he could propose.  It doesn’t ruin it for me really, because I think the moment will feel so surreal to me anyway.  I’m excited for you๐Ÿ˜€

Post # 11
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee

I knew my guy was going to propose soon but he still managed to surprise me. You never know, he might still find a way to surprise you.

Post # 12
Member
504 posts
Busy bee

I picked the ring, knew the day he would propose, etc… it was still very magical and special. We chose this together.

Post # 13
Member
1117 posts
Bumble bee

I knew it was coming. I knew it was happening the night it happened. It was obvious as it was an elaborate date night. It didnt ruin anything at all though. 

Post # 14
Member
219 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2018

I accidentally found out about a week before it happened. It didn’t ruin it for me, but I do wish I hadn’t known. However, he did it at the end of the night so I had just about given up, so that was a surprise at least! ๐Ÿ˜†

Post # 15
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2020

I was not at all surprised, and it was still a very beautiful moment. I knew when he bought the ring, and he proposed 4 months later (when I finished school). I never saw the ring either, but I did see the proposal coming from a mile away and had correctly guessed the day it would happen. I don’t think a surprise is an important aspect of a proposal. For me it was the thought that went into finding a ring I love and asking me to marry him that mattered. For now just try not to dwell on it. Enjoy this time together before wedding planning descends on you

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