Post # 1
So I’m in a bit of a conundrum. I’m living in Cali right now, but I’m from Boston, and all of my family and friends are on the east coast. So my sister is throwing my bridal shower back in the Boston area. Except — I’m assuming I’ll get lots of gifts at the shower, so then what do I do? Do I just go to UPS and spend a ton on shipping to get everything sent back to the west coast where I actually live? Is there any polite way to encourage people to bring small gifts to the shower (like things that would fit in my suitcase)? Anyone else in the same sort of situation?
Post # 3
I live in CA too, but most of my family is in the midwest and my friends are spread all over the country. My mom/sister threw me a sort of long distance shower where everyone just sent gifts, mostly from my registry which shipped directly too me. I know that kind of takes the point out of an in-person shower – you wouldn’t have any gifts to actually open – but if you’re playing games, etc., then maybe it wouldn’t be a big deal. Otherwise, I don’t see a problem with suggesting small gifts or even gift cards from your registry. If you don’t want to mention it on the invitations, then have your sister pass the word around.
Post # 4
Have you thought about doing a honeymoon registery? The theme of the bridal shower could be “Send us Off” and that would encourage guests to purchase items from your honeymoon registery instead of bulky kitchen items.
Post # 5
Tell your sister you’d like a minimal amount of stuff (at least size-wise) to take back. Maybe she can include a note in the invite? Also, I think I’ve seen on the boards that some people returned all their registry gifts, flew home, and then repurchased the same things on the other side of the country…
Post # 6
Do the places that you’re registered at allow you the items to be shipped when they purchase them? When I worked at Dillards (11 years ago) they offerred a shipping service of 6.00 to ship the gifts to the bride or groom’s home or whatever designation they wanted it.
Post # 7
I like the honeymoon registry. What about a gift card shower. I’ve seen one done here for that same reason.
Post # 8
I’ve been to a shower where guests were asked to ship the gifts to the recipient’s home (out of town) and just wrap up a picture of whatever we were sending her. It worked just fine. She still had little things to open and we still enjoyed the chance to socialize and nibble on good food.
Post # 9
Oh TONS of good ideas! Thanks ladies. I can always count on you 🙂
@farfromachildbride — I thought of that idea too. Get the guests to just give me pictures of their gift, which has already been sent to my home. I wasn’t sure how my sister (the host) would get the word out about that though. …and I was also worried that it might be too pushy — like saying to the guests “You need to buy a gift off of the registry and ship it to the bride, right now!” …but I guess a shower involves giving a gift in any case, right?
Post # 10
Nooo, it’s not too pushy at all! Anyone invited to the shower will be close enough to you to already know where you live and will understand your logistical issue of getting gifts home. The invite I got was a normal invitation, with an extra little insert card that said something like, “Since _____ lives in ______, we ask that you please wrap a picture of your gift for the shower and ship the actual item to her home address provided below…”
This particular shower was a baby shower, but would work fine for a bridal shower, too. My pregnant girlfriend was laughing and taking bets on who would show up with a giant box, like the highchair or car seat. But no one did. Everybody followed the directions to a T. Even the older ladies. It’s totally understandable and registeries make it so easy to ship gifts.
Post # 11
I’ve got the same dilemma — getting married in Dallas, but having a shower in Pittsburgh with my family. My Maid/Matron of Honor is going to tuck a note in the invites saying that if guests wish to bring a gift (implying that it’s optional) it would be best to ship it to Dallas so that the bride doesn’t have to FedEx gifts home, and if they like, they can wrap a picture of the gift. The implication is also that they can bring cash or gift cards, both of which I’m fine with. But we’re not outright saying that :p
Post # 12
I’m sharing this dilemma. My FMIL’s friends are throwing me a shower in the Midwest, we live in AZ, and we’re getting married in NC. It’s all very complicated! I have no control over the shower invite, but I jokingly as my Future Mother-In-Law if the theme could be, “Things that fit in a suitcase” so she would realize that we have to get all of the stuff back to AZ, and she does realize that.
My sister-in-law said that for her NC wedding (they live in Seattle) she literally took gifts back to the store and asked them to ship for her, like Bed Bath and Beyond, or she just returned it and bought the same exact thing back at home in Seattle. Worked for me at Christmas with a huge Williams & Sonoma gift!
Good luck 🙂